V. Self-Reflection Items

There are a total of eight self-reflection items (SRIs) in each chapter. For the online and face-to-face versions of the class alike, choose THREE items to discuss.

1. Communication Diary: Choose one of SRI to discuss privately with your teacher. Answer all the questions in the SRI. Refer to at least THREE concepts in the chapter in THREE good paragraphs, then summarize in the fourth paragraph. (20 points).

2. Communication Board Posting: Choose one of the SRIs to discuss openly with your fellow students. Follow the same rules as for CD1 but in the end ask ONE question of your fellow class-mates, a word of advice. (20 points).

3. Communication Board Comment: Write one good paragraph in response to the question posed by your classmate in pairs as assigned by the teacher (10 points).

1. How would you define interpersonal communication competence? Is it appropriate, effective, and ethical or some other set of qualities? Is competence just common sense?

2. Think of an interpersonal encounter in which different people expected very different things from you in your communication. How did you choose which expectations to honor? What were the consequences of your decision? How could you have communicated in a way perceived as appropriate by everyone in the encounter?

3. Read the story presented by Steve on p. 259. How would you respond to Ron? Do you think Ron would be more or less likely to get his work done as a result of your approach? How would other group members judge your skills as group leader, based on how you dealt with Ron?

4. Have you ever shared personal information during an online encounter, only to regret it later? What information did you disclose? What consequences did you suffer? What lessons did you learn about the risks associated with online disinhibition?

5. How do you perceive people whose beliefs, attitudes, and values appear to differ from yours? What challenges do you face in trying to empathize with such people? How might you communicate with them in a nonjudgmental and respectful fashion?

6. In what ways, if any, has shyness affected your communication? Your relationships? Has shyness ever led you to become lonely? What communication plans might help you overcome shyness and alleviate loneliness?

7. Recall a situation in which you were offered a suggestion, advice, or criticism and you reacted defensively. What caused your reaction? What were the outcomes of your defensive communication? How could you have prevented a defensive response?

8. Think of encounters you’ve had with verbally aggressive people. How have you handled them? Did your approach work? What alternatives might have produced better results?

VI. Creative Assignment Focus on Culture

Read Steve’s chapter insert, and answer all the questions posed. Then write a one-page reflection on what you think about the issue and how it pertains to your communication experience. Please refer to at least THREE concepts from the chapter in your response.

COMPETENCE AND AGE

The aging of the American population is a demographic change that highlights the importance of communicating competently with seniors. For example, although only 12.4 percent of Americans are currently over the age of 65, by the year 2100 this percentage will almost double to 23 percent (Gist & Hetzel, 2004).

Unfortunately, when communicating with seniors, many young and middle-aged people shift to “elderspeak”—a form of language characterized by a slower-than-usual rate, a singsong voice, elevated pitch and volume, frivolous terms (“cutie-pie,” “sweety”), and simplified vocabulary and grammar (Williams, Kemper, & Hummert, 2003). Elderspeak is sometimes referred to as “secondary baby talk” because it mirrors the way adults speak to very young children (Kemper & Harden, 1999).

More than 20 percent of nursing home staff communication with seniors consists of elderspeak (O’Connor & Rigby, 1996). In other settings, young and middle-aged communicators use elderspeak when talking with seniors. The longer any particular cross-age encounter endures, the more likely the younger participant is to resort to elderspeak (Kemper, Ferrell, Harden, Finter- Urczyk, & Billington, 1998).

Why do people use elderspeak? In part, they may presume that seniors are incompetent communicators. Some research does suggest that elderspeak can be effective with seniors who are quite elderly or hearing-impaired, but seniors consistently report perceiving elderspeak as patronizing and insulting, and they almost never use it with each other—the most telling indicator of its perceived incompetence. When used consistently over a period of time, elderspeak can trigger decreased self-esteem, depression, withdrawal, and dependence (Kemper & Harden, 1999; Ng, 1998). So how can you communicate competently with seniors? The same way you communicate with any other person—respectfully and with genuine appreciation for their worth.

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

• Think of an encounter in which someone modified his or her communication with you because of your age. How did this communication affect you?

• Now consider how you modify your communication when talking with others who are substantially older or younger than you. Is modifying your communication in this way a sign of competence or incompetence? Why?