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I should not be here with you.”

“What’s wrong? What’s happened? You look like you’re in terrible pain.”

She reached one hande dСЂont hesitantly toward him, but he lurched away from her, not able to bear her

gesture of kindness.

“You must not touch me!”

“Okay!” She dropped her hand shakily to her side. “I won’t touch you. Just sit down and tell me what’s going

on.”

“No.” He took another step back. “I should have obeyed your command to create the map, delivered it to

you, and returned to my lair.”

“I didn’t command you to make the map. I asked you to, just like I asked you to have dinner with me. You

didn’t do anything wrong—we didn’t do anything wrong,” she said, looking utterly confused by his sudden

change.

“That is where you are mistaken. You did nothing wrong, but I did. Today I began to twist the threads of

reality into a waking dream, something that, even in this realm of dreams and magick, is as impossible as it is

dangerous. This cannot happen again.”

The Guardian flung himself from the balcony. With the agility of a beast and the power of a god, he distanced

himself from her, and as he did the pain in his body subsided, leaving him exhausted and empty.

So this was what his life had come to. This was what it was to be. He was a man within a beast, tethered by a

goddess. He was to know desire but not surcease. Like Tantalus, he was to live in torment—his relief in sight,

but unattainable. Asterius stumbled to a halt, threw back his head and roared his agony to the deaf heavens.

file:///C:/DOCUME~1/Mary/LOCALS~1/Temp/Rar$EX00.281/P%20C...

104 of 181 1/14/2009 9:43 PM

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

MIKKI woke up with a headache and puffy, red eyes. Yawning and stretching, she walked to the wall of

windows and opened the door. The sun was just starting to peek over the horizon, and the morning was so

cool she could see her breath. Someone had already cleared away all the dishes from dinner. It made Mikki

sad, as if the night before, the good along with the bad, had been wiped away without a trace. She walked

over to the chair in which he had sat, her fingers lingering on the back of it.

Asterius . . .

He’d never be just the Guardian to her again, not after what he’d told her last night, and not after what she’d

seen in his eyes—a soul-deep loneliness, and, for just a moment, a longing that struck an answering cord

within her.

But it didn’t matter that he’d given her a glimpse of his soul. Nothing could come of it. And not just because

of the obvious—that he was a beast, or, more accurately, he was a creature, a mixture of mortal and god, a

being like no other, as he had explained last night. Asterius . . . No. It wasn’t because of the obvious; the

obvious mattered less and less to her. If she was honest with herself, she’d have to admit that, even back in

Tulsa when he’d first begun to seduce her in her dreams, his appearance hadn’t been a deterrent. The truth

was quite the opposite. His appearance had been a fascination from the beginning.

It was impossible between them because he was making it that way. It was as if there was some kind of

unwritten rule that no one was allowed to get close to him. He’d touched her—kissed her—clearly desired

her. th T‡ Yet he’d run from her as if she was the one who was dangerous. His behavior was confusing and

just plain annoying.

Mikki rubbed at her eyes again. Okay, maybe it was a rule. Maybe no one was allowed to be close to him.

The smart thing to do would be to talk to Hecate about him. To ask the goddess about . . . about . . . about

what? Did she really want to ask the imposing Hecate if it was okay that her new Empousa had a crush on the

man-beast that was her Guardian? Please. Mikki wasn’t an idiot. It wasn’t okay. Asterius had made that clear.

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