Friends and Friendship

Friendship is a very great thing and that’s why people of all countries have so many proverbs about it. There are a lot of proverbs about friends in English. Here are some of them: “A good friend is as the sun in winter”, “A friend is easier lost than found”, “A friend to everybody is a friend to nobody”. But my favourite one is “A friend in need is a friend indeed”. It means that the best friend is the one who helps you when you are really in need of help.You know your real friends when you are in a difficult situation.

The real friendship is possible when people understand each other, when they respect and trust each other. Friendship between people grows when they do something useful together and when they have the same interests.

Nobody can live without friends. Neither can I. I am very sociable. I make friends with people easily so I have a lot of friends but only one of them is my intimate friend. This is Nikolay.

Nikolay is 16. He isn’t tall enough for his age. He’s only 5 feet 6. But Nikolay takes after his father and I’m sure he’s going to be very tall in a year or two.

He has an oval face with a high forehead, a straight nose and thin lips. His hair is dark and slightly curly. He has light blue eyes and such long and thick eyelashes that his eyes seem dark because of it. He has dimples in his cheeks when he’s smiling. They make his face childish and attractive. In my opinion he’s very handsome.

Nick is a manly broad-shouldered fellow with a muscular body and strong legs because he does sports regularly and is a first-class footballer. Besides he’s always well-dressed, in the height of fashion. He would like to look like a Hollywood star. Some people think he’s very ambitious and self-confident. But they are mistaken. That is only an outward appearance. In fact Nikolay is a very thoughtful, calm and shy boy. I know the proverb “Handsome is that handsome does”. This is just about my friend, a boy of high moral qualities. Sometimes I wonder how it happened that Nikolay and I made friends. We are so different! Nick is a hard worker, I’m light-minded and unpractical. People say: “Opposites attract”. They are right. Being so different Nikolay and I are a good match and love each other very much.

Topical Vocabulary

to be in need of help	нуждаться в помощи
to respect	уважать
to trust	доверять
an intimate friend	близкий друг
ambitious	честолюбивый, амбициозный
to make friends	подружиться
light-minded	легкомысленный

I. Who do you turn to in stressful time? Your family, your partner, a good friend or all three? Probably your oldest friend?

Friends can be a source of stress. But they can also be great support during stressful times. Research has shown that women with at least one good friend in whom they can confide are 90 per cent less likely to become depressed than those women without close friends. It is the quality of friends, not the quantity that’s important here. And a good friend should be appreciated like a priceless jewel.

II. Do you have a good friend? How do you appreciate her/him? How does she/he help you in stressful situations?

III. Read the tips how to maintain a true friendship:

Let your friend win an argument occasionally. Be the first to apologize.

Don’t say anything behind his back that you wouldn’t say to his face.

Listen!

Be prepared to share in a friend’s failure.

Accept him for who he is.

Which of the tips do you follow? Add some more tips.

IV. Look at the recipe for a happy friendship and discuss these questions in small groups.

1. Which do you think the most important ingredients are? Why? Rank them in order of importance starting with the most important.

2. What other ingredients for a happy friendship can you think of?

A Recipe for a Happy Friendship

1. Make time to see your best friend.

2. Listen to your friend’s problems.

3. Don’t leave your friend out of new friendship, hobbies or interests.

4. Don’t talk about your friend to other people. She/he will be very hurt when she/he finds out what you’ve been saying.

5. Learn to apologize. It’s important to admit mistakes.

6. Always give your friend time to be alone if she/he wants it.

V. Answer the questions:

1. Do you have a really good friend? What makes this person so special for you? Do you believe that your friendship will last long? What makes you think so?

2. Some people believe that the best part of one’s life consists of one’s friends. Do you share this point of view? Give your reasons.

3. What kind of things do you think can cause friendships to break up? Have you had any experiences of a friendship coming to an end?

VI. Choose the item that suits you best.

Are you a Good Friend?

1. What do you think is the most important thing for a successful friendship?

   1. sympathizing with our friends;

   2. being independent;

   3. being taken care of.

2. What do you prefer in a friendship?

   1. trust;

   2. selfishness;

   3. curiosity.

3. How do you react if you have quarreled with your friend?

   1. You are the first to try to put up.

   2. You are stubborn.

   3. You rarely quarrel.

4. Do you always remember your friends’ birthdays?

   1. never;

   2. always;

   3. sometimes.

5. How open-hearted are you in a friendship?

   1. You are always straightforward.

   2. You are sometimes frank.

   3. You are usually reserved.

6. What will you do or feel if your friend gives you an awful birthday present?

   1. You’ll tell him the truth.

   2. You’ll frown.

   3. You’ll appreciate his care.

7. How will you react if your friend dances with your girlfriend/boyfriend?

   1. You’ll bite your lips.

   2. You’ll become red with anger.

   3. You’ll smile broadly.

8. If you could choose among six friends – what kind of person would you choose?

   1. reliable, but shy;

   2. sociable, but self-oriented;

   3. intelligent, but self-assured;

   4. sympathizing, but boring;

   5. calm, but lazy;

   6. creative, but idealistic.

9. What do you usually do when your friend talks about something that doesn’t interest you at all?

   1. You listen politely, nod your head, but think about something else.

   2. You raise your brows and try to show interest.

   3. You widen your eyes and sigh deeply.

10. What’s your idea of a perfect entertainment?

    1. playing a sports game with your friends;

    2. dancing and singing at a party or a disco;

    3. discussing some interesting topics.

11. If your friend doesn’t want to go to the party with you, what will you do?

    1. You’ll phone and apologize that neither of you can come.

    2. You’ll go alone.

    3. You’ll try again to persuade him/her to go.

    4. You’ll find someone else to go with.

Answer key

1. a- 0, b- 2, c- 1;

2. a- 2, b- 1, c- 0;

3. a- 1, b- 0, c- 0;

4. a- 2, b- 1, c- 0;

5. a- 0, b- 1, c- 2;

6. a- 0, b- 2, c- 1;

7. a- 1, b- 0, c- 2;

8. a- 2, b- 2, c- 1, d – 0, e – 2, f – 0;

9. a- 1, b- 2, c- 0;

10. a- 2, b- 0, c- 0;

11. a- 0, b- 1, c- 1, d – 2.

Your score means:

16-22: You are a very sociable, careful, sympathizing friend. You try to deal with people who are equal to you.

8-15: You are an honest, kind, helpful friend. All your friends enjoy your company and you are equally friendly to everybody.

0-7: You are a smart, straightforward, decent friend. You always stand up for your friends in difficulties. But sometimes you prefer loneliness.