Try to figure out who filled the role of Victim, Persecutor, and Rescuer;

In the end, you will try to determine which role you fill in most of the time. Are you always Persecuting everyone? Playing the eternal Victim?

Now, try to think of the reason why that happens. Also, consider how your behavior affects you and those around you. Do the same for the other parties involved in the conflict(s).

All things considered, this all sounds mildly depressing, unhealthy, and filled with conflict. Is there a way of dealing with conflict that’s healthy at the same time? Well, that’s why we have the Winner’s Triangle.

What Is the Winner’s Triangle?

Acey Choy created this model at the beginning of the 90s. What is its relation to the Drama Triangle?

Well, using the exercise we provided in the previous section, you can gain a bit of insight into your reactions.

By studying those, you can understand when you’re taking on a “Drama” role, and work towards healthier ones. Namely, the ones in the Winner’s Triangle. Here are the three roles we will be discussing:

Assertive

The assertive person has no trouble expressing themselves clearly. Their thoughts will not sound passive or aggressive, and they do not care for any possible rejection or disapproval.

Instead, an Assertive will voice their opinion with calm, and will try not to feed the fires of conflict. This helps others understand where you’re coming from.

Unlike the Persecutor, people will not hate you for simply telling everyone they’re wrong about you. If you communicate your thoughts clearly, you can avoid some headaches well in advance.

Vulnerable

A Vulnerable is basically a Victim but without the constant victim complex. They communicate their negative feelings, but will assume responsibility when that is the case.

Furthermore, they always try to think how they got in their current predicament, but will find ways to deal with it and move on.