Morality

Discussing matters of right and wrong could easily be misconstrued as a move to enforce morality on our Fellowship. Anyone who knows NA well will see that this is not likely to happen. We are a tribe of gypsies bound together by common cause and our need for recovery. If preachy, moralizing material is written, there is not much chance of it attaining a significant readership. The language in the Fellowship has always been spiritual principles.

 

Most of us understand that:

1.   Morality has to do with right and wrong. I NA we utilize spiritual principles to guide us in situations where we don't otherwise know what to do. 

2.      Belief in a loving God in some form is required for recovery.

3.      NA is not aligned with any formal religious organization.

4.      Our morality is based on an inner feeling of correctness spread over a large and unregulated group of sincere people who have been clean and worked towards Step 12 for a number of years. Finding out what they think or feel on an issue or question of policy is called group conscience. Policy is defined as 'plan of action:' what to do when a certain thing happens. Good policy insures that we apply the lessons we have learned.

5.      Spiritual principles starting with honesty, open-mindedness and the willingness to try are our guides in dealing with life on life’s terms.

Personal responsibility, applies to morality as well as spirituality, "In a justly ordered world were loss of equipoise would mean complete destruction; personal responsibility must be absolute," writes James Allen in his book "As a Man Thinketh"  Morality for the fellowship would definitely be something each individual would find their own sense of. They would have a sponsor that would lovingly yet sternly and effectivly encourage them to travel that path. When fear of possible criticism or exclusion freezes recoverying addicts into silence, you can almost watch disorder proliferate from the fear. We who have long occupied the lowest rung on the social ladder should realize how quickly these problems fade when we face them squarely. Thoughts create actions. We have to be careful about out words in recovery. Political correctness follows the herding instinct and without spiritual direction, we go where the cows want us to go – into the ditch and field. This is fine if you are a cow. Falling back on business issues is fine if you are primarily a business.  At some point, a person must be willing to think for themselves and reach their own conclusions. That is why NA is not aligned with formal religions, to allow members to develop their own lives and recovery. We cannot assume that every member has the moral fiber to think for themselves. It is obvious from the state of affairs many are quite comfortable having someone else think for them. Perhaps many are not aware of the need to think for themselves. They are quite comfortable to let politicians do for the most part as they please and remain blissfully unaware of what is going on. And for most, no matter how informed they become, frustration seems to be the main result. On the other hand when it comes to recovery and this Fellowship, the situation is entirely different.

 

Here’s how one member sees it:

 

“My rewards are spiritual in nature and no matter what the result of the things that seem political in nature in our Fellowship my rewards are still the same. They are rewards of the inside. Rewards of having known I took a moral stand and I am trying my best to carry the message to the addict who still suffers. If I am working with men and women who I hope are also surrendered to the God of their understanding and doing their best to follow direction of their God to fulfill our Fifth Tradition then that is much different to me than trying to work side by side with others who may have all kinds of mixed messages. While political correctness has inserted itself into our Fellowship, I still assert we are a Fellowship built on spiritual principles and morality.   ”The rewards of understanding the difference are very important. Some may be grateful for someone taking the time to point that out. Others may get angry at those who do. Still others may keep on baaing, grazing and going off the cliff without bothering to look. “

If a person is working steps it would be thought or hoped that they would grow towards and start developing some morals and ethics. From surrender to belief to relinguishing control of our lives to our Higher Power, we are asked in Step 4 to list and to share in Step 5 what we think we do right and what wrong. Having God remove defects that have grown up in our active addiction, we become new people, spiritually. Living up to the responsibilities contained in Steps 6, 7, and 8 we are allowed to correct the mistakes made along the way through the amends in Step 9. When we do this all the time in Step 10, growth and maintenance of our spirituality through prayer and meditaion of Step 11 becomes possible. The Spiritual Awakening of Step 12 comes to us when we can surrender, grow in faith and make our peace with our fellow man so we can go deeply into Step 11. An Addict shares:

ok, here we go, a differing opinion, lets see if open mindedness is a concept or a reality. up front, let me state clearly that ego deflation is absolutely necessary to the creating the environment that the seed of recovery can be planted in. untill and unless that catastrophic rejection of self will occurs, recovery will be a battle, not a surrender. Here is where my perspective begins to divert.... when i came to na in 87, i heard 2 distinct messages in the rooms, one was a belligerent work the steps or die motherfucker* ...the other was work the steps and live, you don’t have to die. my life up till na was based on a concept of power. i was stronger than some folks, weaker than a few. My interactions with others depended on where i decided they were on the food chain. when i saw addicts acting like feudal lords over "their meetings", "their sponsees"... i recognized the dynamics of that same food chain. the disease of addiction is sufficient to the task of destroying the ego, when i limped into na, i was near dead, spiritually, emotionally and physically. i didn’t need to have my ass kicked, I needed to be healed. truth be told, my time in na has revealed to me that kicking ass for their own good is usually justified bullying, originating from fear, based on a belief that the higher power doesn’t know what its doing. any other addict that i meet on my path of recovery is invited to be there by a higher power. no matter what na credentials they have, length of time, circle of friends etc., can elevate them from the position of fellow traveler. all addicts are of equal status, from newcomer to gods most holy dinosaurs. now sharing experience strength and hope with newcomers is much different than shoving an ego laden message down the throat of a critically ill newcomer. responsible, caring, spiritually awakened addicts do in fact wrestle with the denial and self centerdness of newcomers, but we are only assisting the work of a higher power, its not an invitation to lord our recovery over anyone. na is an emergency room, not a locker room. the message that saved my life(both physical and spiritual)was that none of the steps were designed to hurt me, i had already done that to myself. the country club mentality of some members of na is harmful to the message of this healing program. some sponsorship families have a self appointed vip status, but to me it looks like some combination of ancestor worship and elitism. recovery has been a personal journey with hp guiding, it is a journey shared with many, but controlled by none but hp. looking forward to any views on this subject, i am open to more being revealed. *Motherfucker has nothing directly to do with sex. It has to do with someone claiming authority over a child under the guise of having a special relationship with their mom in a single parent household, hence “You can’t tell me what to do! You’re just my mothers lover.”

 

Allowing market conditions, personal power plays and ‘political correctness’ to enter this delicate and wondrous process cannot really happen because these things stop the process from happening. Self-discipline is creative and helps us change into better people. Control is deadening. It works not in recovery or in any other part of life except the barbarism of war, where people do not really matter. People on our side are expendable to wipe out people on the other side who are even more expendable. In recovery, our people are not expendable. Self imposed discipline is creative because it is directed by a person’s spirit. Sometimes a little assault and battery is needed:

 

When I had about six weeks and was all knowing in my views of recovery an addict named Dewitt picked me up by the neck and slammed me up against a wall and told me to shut the f**k up, as i was not adding to the recovery of the group, just carrying the mess. Now I go at 6'4" and 300 lbs and Dewitt made me look small. And before anyone says how dare he do that to a newcomer, it was the best thing to happen to me. I was intimidated into opening my ears to true recovery. If I tried to do that today to some of our six week recovery wonders, I shudder to think what would happen. As I once heard in a movie, "Sometimes a little assault and battery is needed." (LOL) but in my own way i carry on for dewitt with a strong message of recovery and what is appropriate based on what I was taught by the strong men of NA I was exposed to early on.  

If an individual is sincere they will surely grow towards the ideals they develop about morality. They develop morals and ethics and have a path to walk that lets one apply spiritual principles to their life and the way they live it. Kinda sounds like "a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps." This is the kind of thing recovering addicts try to get new people to see. If we as a Fellowship start trying to teach morality, we would be violating several of the 12 Traditions of NA. Particularly, we would become teachers instead of leading by example. We would develop other requirements for membership and our group purpose would exclude those who could not agree with us.  From the US West Coast:

You are spot on, man. I was brought up with the same guidance. Sit your ass down, you have not been at a meeting unless you are there when it opens, and closes, and you better take a piss before and grab your coffee, your ass goes in the seat and stays there. Keep your mouth closed, and your ears open. Pray you get recovery before the disease of addiction gets you...

I have not been paying attention to the big picture these days. I visited our area this month for the first time that I have been home since August. There seemed to be an air or attitude that I just did not get! I was so jumpy, that after open forum, I left as fast as my little legs could carry me. I was only there to give a point of information as to how and why there was such a large credit carrying for the New Lit. sales person...  I served this position in 95 & 96.....At that time we were hoping to accomplish purchasing Literature in advance by the case so that we could get the bulk discount...Well come to find out (after area) that offer of discount purchase is no longer available. Only under contract direct with the WSO. The Northern California Region no longer sells in Bulk at discount...Yet as I sat and listened to everyone’s reports waiting for the open forum..(I knew most folks in the room..) something was very different... See when I got home and was looking through my mail,,,(3 months worth) I was reading one of the NA WAYS...After the conference...Where the fellowship was being asked to discuss 2 issues.. one being our "Public Image" and one being once again "what is the proper NA message" of course tied in with the Issue of Public Image...Concern being that "Some" professional would not refer any young women, due to NA being full of predators... My eyebrows twisted and my mouth dropped...I felt that tug of fear... When the light came on with the 10th tradition....."Narcotics Anonymous has no opinion on outside issues; hence the N.A. name ought never be drawn into public controversy". Shook my head again...and wondered what it was the WSO was diverting the fellowships focus away from. Hence I was relieved of that part of my disease that wanted to jump in. For any of us to DISCUSS these issues… is a violation of the 10th tradition. What folks think of us is an outside issue… EVEN if they are in a "PUBLIC MEETING"...now I am paying attention to other members whom are suffering over discussing these issues and watching their fear of NAs' survival...One member whom I love dearly is expressing it through Their service work with our Outreach committee.... I stay silent and pray.... for the moment that I can be of service to that person, and or any member suffering... So what is going on that we really need to be focusing on? Have a conscious on? It Certainly is not something that is a clear violation of the traditions, once again..... So as I am pondering this and asking for this to be revealed: I am starting to see that our disease has Spiritual Principals ..like DIVERSION... FALSE FEAR....and...OVERPOWERING ourselves and others. Like Lower Power verses Higher Power..... So as I was briefly reading this to make sure I could understand my own writing...I realized that I only checked with one region... I remembered, we can buy from any region we want... maybe there are other regions that still offer bulk discounts to Area's This seems to be my most pressing issue seeing that I have spent over 60.00 buying books for new sponsees... I am starting to tell folks to steal them.. (It gets a good Laugh)...10.42 cents apiece.... Some things just have not changed yet....

 

 

From the East Coast:

 

They're $ 12.50 in Pittsburgh. When me and a member brought up, why? At the region, last week we were given all kinds of insane reasons but none of them congruent. They're cheaper at the recovery book store than at the regional office????? One reason that was given was, we needed more money to send World-- (WHY?) - explain that - I stepped out and prayed, to avoid getting upset enough to fight. So now the research begins, for that is just one of many problems being avoided here--those skimming off the top are good at deflecting the truth and trying to spin it around on their "accusers" '---that’s ok-- at least today. My battles are fought with facts and intelligence, and good motive, with the Traditions to back it up. Years ago would have been a different story. They don't like it here when you bring literature to the service meetings, some thing to do with--- being accountable ---that seems to be a problem with the powers that be. And I thought they were supposed to be accountable to and serve the fellowship, silly me.

 

For the NA program to work we have to reach the deeper levels. That is what the 12 steps are all about. Corporate management and political correctness do not reach these levels. This deep inner core, in every person, comes together in NA and forms what we call group conscience. lt may be that there are two NA programs at any given time, each unaware of the other. There is the corporate management power structure on one side. The loving caring spiritual side on the other. If this be the case we can live with it. But it is something that needs to be known so we can keep first things first.

 

Breach of social contract can be devastating to the individual and the NA Society as a whole. Our society has been built on the idea that together we can do what is impossible alone. As we become part of NA and develop some way of helping as part of our program, we each become an important part of a modern day miracle. Our trust bonds become the source of a life giving energy and we dare not break them. When we are allowed through the barriers, we communicate with the inner being of a person. This can be done in a group setting. In rare cases, many more people can be involved. Our group conscience process is something like this. It involves trust, non-injury, loving care and concern, a leap of faith and an ability to follow through. This human interaction goes way beyond corporate goals and office talk. It involves parts of a person that cannot be bought or sold. This is not the way wars are begun, it is the way wars are ended.

12.28.04

 

Chapter Nineteen