Chapter 20

"HEY DR. DONOVAN. You're here early," Penny said as Kim walked by the nurses' station.

Kim approached the counter where Penny stood. She set down a cardboard tray with coffee and pastries "Good morning. Did you have a nice holiday?" She glanced around, hoping to spot Jess.

"Yes." Penny beamed. "How about you, did you spend Thanksgiving with anyone special?"

Oh, here we go again. Penny frequently attempted to find out if she was involved with anyone. Well aware of Penny's interest in her, Kim tried to discourage it. Normally, she would have ignored the question since all of her free time these days was spent with Jess. And there was no way in hell she would ever tell anyone that. But in this case, she didn't think it would hurt to give out a little information about her private life. "I spent my day serving meals at a homeless shelter."

"Oh." Penny looked a bit stymied, then she smiled brightly. "Well, of course, I would do something like that in a minute if I could. But with my family over for the holiday and all, my mom needed me."

Right. Sure you would. Kim had been surprised when she learned that Penny was only a few years her junior. She acted much younger. Penny wasn't shy about discussing her personal life. In conversations around the nurses' station, Kim had discovered that Penny still lived with her parents. More remarkably to Kim, Penny didn't seem the least bit embarrassed that her mother still did her laundry, cleaned her room, and cooked her meals. Kim was willing to bet Penny had not lifted a finger to help out at Thanksgiving.

Kim picked up her tray off the counter. "Well, page me if you need me." With that she turned and headed toward Jess's office.

Finding Jess's door locked, Kim let herself in with the key Jess had given her. She glanced around the office that had over the last few weeks come to feel like her office as much as Jess's. She set the tray down on the desk. A sigh escaped. There was no sign that Jess had arrived yet.

Okay. I'm anxious to see my friend. So what? There's nothing wrong with that. She blew out a breath. Be honest with yourself, Kim, if no one else. One thing their time apart had made crystal clear to Kim was that she could no longer delude herself as to the depth of her feelings for Jess. She had missed Jess with an intensity that had shocked her. It was as if a vital part of herself had been missing.

Kim was startled out of her thoughts by the opening of the office door. Her heart soared at the sight of Jess.

Jess stepped into the room. A bright smile blossomed when she spotted Kim. "Hi." The door swung shut behind her.

All the loneliness and longing Kim had struggled with for the past four days overwhelmed her. Kim crossed the room, and before she realized what she was doing, she enveloped Jess in a hug. "Welcome back." Reality struck like lightening when she came into contact with Jess's stiff body. You idiot! "Sorry," Kim stammered and pulled back.

Jess's arms wrapped around her, stopping Kim's retreat.

Kim's heart rate shot into overdrive when Jess pulled her close and returned the hug. The warmth of Jess's body drew her in. When Jess didn't immediately let go, Kim had to fight the urge to bury her face in Jess's neck. A tantalizing scent she couldn't put a name to teased her senses. Her arms instinctively tightened around Jess's back. A single powerful thought filled her mind. Home.

The hug lingered for much longer than a quick greeting between friends.

"Good to see you too," Jess said, near her ear before finally releasing her. Her voice was a husky whisper that sent shivers down Kim's spine.

Thoroughly flustered by the embrace, Kim stepped back. Although Jess had more than returned the hug, which in itself was unexpected, Kim was still nervous about her reaction. She met Jess's gaze hesitantly.

Jess's eyes were silvery-blue pools of emotion.

Unspoken longing hung between them like a palpable presence.

Kim's world tilted, then righted itself as a new understanding dawned. She does want me. Drawn like a humming bird to a tempting flower, Kim reached out to stroke Jess's flushed cheek. Her fingers trembled.

The rap of knuckles on the office door shattered the moment.

Jess hastily pulled back before Kim's fingers made contact.

Oh God. Kim mentally shook herself. She had been seconds from kissing Jess.

A second louder knock sounded. "Dr. McKenna?" Penny called.

Kim quickly moved away from Jess.

Jess spun around and jerked open the door. "Yes?"

"Here are the files you wanted," Penny said. She peered past Jess as she handed over the files. Her gaze darted back and forth between Jess and Kim. A frown marred her face.

"Was there something else?" Jess asked.

Penny shook her head.

"Thanks for the files," Jess said and then promptly shut the door in Penny's face.

Damn. Jess was shaking. With a white-knuckled grip on the doorknob, she struggled to regain her composure. She knew she should be grateful to Penny for the interruption. But if she was honest with herself — she wasn't. Kim's impromptu hug had shocked her at first, but the feeling had immediately turned to guilty pleasure at the feel of Kim pressed against her. The intoxicating scent of Kim's perfume had made her head swim. Or at least that was what she was telling herself to excuse letting the embrace go on for as long as she had. You are so pathetic.

The expression on Kim's face afterward had been as thrilling as the embrace itself. Her beautiful face had been painted with arousal. You know how fast that would change if you ever acted on those feelings. Jess sighed, all too aware of just how true that was. For a moment, Jess had been sure Kim was going to kiss her. She still wasn't sure she would have had the willpower to refuse, no matter how bad an idea. She mentally shook herself and turned to face Kim.

Kim had moved away. She was standing by the desk.

Jess joined her. A rosy flush still colored Kim's cheeks. Jess wanted to pull her back into her arms and never let go. Unwilling to openly acknowledge the emotions that still tinged the air so strongly between them, Jess struggled for something to say. Her gaze landed on the coffee sitting on her desk. She propped her hip on the desk, then picked up one of the Del Java coffee cups. "For me?" Jess asked with a pleased smile.

An answering smile flitted across Kim's face. "Of course."

Jess picked up the bag and held it up to her forehead. "I, Swami, predict that this contains a chocolate croissant and a maple scone."

Laughing, Kim pulled the bag out of her hand. "You know me too well."

Not even close to how well I'd like to know you. If only things could be different. Jess forced a smile. "Thanks for the coffee."

"You're welcome. So how was your Thanksgiving?" Kim asked.

"Not bad. I enjoyed seeing my family, but it's good to be home." Jess was almost afraid to ask, but she had to know. "How was your holiday?"

"Busier than I planned. Do you remember the teenage boy you saw a few weeks ago who presented as a suspected overdose?"

"Vaguely." Jess saw so many patients that after a while they all tended to blur together. Her brow furrowed. What's that got to do with Thanksgiving?

"Well, my name was on his hospital paperwork as the consulting psychiatrist. It was really an amazing coincidence. Turns out, the director of the group foster home for teens where he lives is an old friend from college. She called me the day before Thanksgiving."

I knew I shouldn't have left. An emotion so foreign she almost didn't recognize it claimed Jess. "Oh, were you good friends?" She tried hard to keep her tone neutral.

Kim's gaze darted away. She picked up her coffee and took a swallow.

Jealousy clawed at Jess. She's an ex.

Setting her cup down, Kim said, "I haven't seen Sid since I left Michigan to go to medical school." She shook her head. "She's really changed. Anyway, she called to catch up and I ended up spending Thanksgiving with her."

Dread replaced jealousy, knotting Jess's stomach. Does Kim want to get back together with her? The very thought was enough to make Jess sick to her stomach. You knew this would eventually happen. Someone as wonderful as Kim doesn't stay single forever. It didn't make the reality of it any easier to take.

Tilting her head, Kim regarded Jess curiously. "What's wrong?"

Realizing her expression had betrayed her, Jess fought to hide her rising emotions. She shook her head. "Nothing. Sorry. You were saying?"

Kim's eyebrow arched, and she held Jess's gaze for a moment. She seemed about to question Jess further, then changed her mind. She brushed her hair over her shoulder before moving back to lean against Jess's desk. "Sid's group volunteers every year at a local homeless shelter on Thanksgiving. When Sid asked if I'd be willing to help out supervising the teens and serving meals, I couldn't say no. Afterward, we went back to the group home and I met Sid's partner, Alan." Kim laughed. "Shocked me when I met him. In college, Sid swore men were the root of all evil in the world."

Relief almost buckled Jess's knees. She grabbed the side of the desk. For the first time since this conversation started Jess didn't have to force a smile. "I'm glad you didn't spend the day alone. I felt bad that I had already committed to going to my parents before I knew you weren't going home."

Kim briefly squeezed Jess's arm. "I'm sorry I missed your call on Thanksgiving. Next time you don't reach me at home, call my cell. I always want to hear from you."

Jess met Kim's emotion-filled eyes and saw her own feelings reflected back at her. Jess tensed, expecting the familiar fear to strike that such an emotionally vulnerable moment always brought. Equal parts relief and surprise flowed through her when it didn't happen. Something had definitely shifted between them.