The Changing Patterns of Families

17. Family is one of the most common human institutions; however, it doesn't mean the same thing to various groups of people. Sociologists say that the American family is in a state of flux and ask alarmingly: "Will the traditional American family survive?" Cheril Brown from the Administration for Children and Families which is part of the United States Department of Health and Human Services will help us understand if there are any causes for alarm. What does the concept of a "traditional American family" include, Cheril?

1. The concept of a "traditional American family" requires clarification. There is no single family pattern in the United States that can wholly and universally depict "the American family". Some people idealize family as a married couple with the husband as breadwinner, the wife as a homemaker and child care provider, and all the children living together under one roof until they get married or move out on their own. But the structure of the American family has changed so considerably that there can be several definitions today, for example:

1. a fundamental social group in society typically consisting of parents and their offspring;

2. two or more people who share resources, responsibility for decisions, values and goals, and have commitments to one another over a period of time, and reside usually in the same place;

3. all the members of a household under one roof.

17. When speaking about the family, the word “household” seems to be used increasingly frequently .

1. This word allows for many different forms of the family. A household is a domestic unit consisting of all the people living in a house, which includes single people and nonfamilies, childless couples, homosexual couples, etc.

17. What factors affect family behavior?

1. First of all, home life does. The home is the center of family activities including caring for the children, keeping house, entertaining friends, playing games, watching television. In the home, children learn basic social skills, such as how to talk and get along with others, how to run the house and how to care for and give emotional support to their family members. They also learn health and safety habits.

A family’s home life is influenced by which members live in the home and by the roles each member plays. Home life can also be affected by relatives who live outside the family’s home. Traditions, law, and social conditions also affect family behavior in various ways reflecting scientific, economic and social developments and changing attitudes.

17. What are the most visible areas of difference between the family of the 2000's and, say, that of our greatgrandfather's?

1. There are quite a few of them.

1. First of all, that's the difference in size. "Size" denotes three different things here.

1. Family has grown much smaller. Anybody with ten children would be viewed as strange and antique. Modern birth control methods enable couples to limit the size of their family and to space their children. Today parents do not need "reserve children" to carry on the work of the family, therefore, a large number of children are no longer a source of security and pride. More and more families have only one child. Demographers put it down to the fact that the birth of a child worsens housing and financial conditions. Every new child takes up more time and care and is seen as an economic burden, affecting parents' ability to meet their cultural and intellectual needs. As a result, the desire to have more children recedes to the background. Though that's a serious problem, reduced rates of population growth are not the only cause for alarm. An only child can get accustomed to being spoilt, which can develop into selfishness. Besides, statistics show that in families with one child relations are less stable than in families with several.

2. Earlier the meaning of the word "family" included relatives who were a regular part of one's life because they lived near by. Today, as the first definition of the word "family" shows, it means the nuclear family, not the extended family of the old days.

3. The trend toward independent living for both the younger and older generations also contributes to the diminishing of the family. Many young adults move out of their parent’s home, establish their own households, and attend college or start a carrer before getting married.

2. The second area of change has occurred in the status of the husband and the wife. In the old days, men's and women's roles were very distinct. The man's responsibility was to earn a living to support his family. The woman raised children, cared for the family, nursed the sick and the aged. Now spouses are becoming equal partners in marriage and family life.

3. The third difference lies in the fact that the attitude to marriage has changes immensely. In early days, the word "marriage" meant the union of one man and one woman till death. Let me quote two statements from the Bible teaching about marriage: "…a wife must not leave her husband; … and a husband must not divorce his wife" (Apostle Paul's letter to the Corinthians, 7) "a married woman is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives; but if he dies, then she is free from the law that bound her to him" (Apostle Paul's letter to the Romans, 7) . The marriage vow meant exactly what it ran: "I ___ take thee to be my wedded wife/ husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy ordinance; and thereto I plight thee my troth". As we see, marriage was something permanent. It was a sacred bond. It was an instrument for the continuation of the family line based on social arrangement, responsibility, and obedience. Mate selection was based on family needs and interests, and marriage was seen as a contract between families. Today marriage means different things to different people. Sometimes it doesn't mean much at all. Marriage may mean commitment, raising children, romance, absence of romance, companionship, partnership, love, investment, caring, legal inheritance of property, wealth accumulation, convenience, strength and stability, emotional involvement, security, intimate relationship, safe sex, mutual assistance, additional economic burden, shared financial problems, pressure, lack of freedom, obedience, dependence, boredom, violence, fun.

4. The fourth area of change follows from the previous one. We could hardly speak about marriage/family as a stable, permanent and lifelong institution of the 2000's. It is a mutually beneficial relationship, a temporary arrangement. Now we have to take for granted that there are a number of alternatives to the traditional marriage in the form of transient relationships desired. Probably that accounts for the fact that more and more adults are remaining single, living together without getting married, delaying having children, or not having children at all. As a result, family structures that were not considered traditional in the past are now accepted as the norm. Blended families (consisting of remarried couples and their children from previous marriage) adoptive families, foster families, interracial families, childless couples occur more and more frequently today than they ever did in the past. We also speak about single-parent and, finally, two-worker families.

17. By the way, what is the average age for marriage in the United States?

1. The average age for marriage in the United States has increased to 26.5 for men and 24.5 for women.

17. The number of divorces is continuously increasing. The United States has the highest separation and divorce rate in the world. Over one million divorces occur each year in the country (half of them within the first seven years of marriage). How can you account for this increased divorce rate?

1. Divorce has become a sizable problem affecting every member of the family. Couples get divorced for numerous reasons. The main reason is that they expect a great deal from family life hoping to find a constant source of personal satisfaction and happiness. They forget that they must be not only takers but givers as well. Second, women have experienced an increase in financial and social independence. They don't depend on their husbands for the basic necessities of life. Third, the economic situation of families has made the employment of women a necessity rather than a choice. Some women have been forced out into the workforce to be employed for pay. Fourth, more women are seeking further education and career opportunities. Fifth, changes in divorce laws made divorce easier to obtain. Divorce can be graned both on fault grounds (adultery, desertion, alcoholism, drug addiction, failure to support, mental or physical cruelty) and non-fault grounds (irreconcilable differences). Sixth, the public and religious attitudes toward divorce have changed toward greater acceptance.

17. Some people believe that the rise in the number of one-parent families indicates the deterioration of the family as well as the deterioration of society. What do you think?

1. Undeniably, the number of family groups with children maintained by single parents is rising. The majority of these single-parent families are headed by women. This often causes financial problems. The cost of child care causes an additional financial burden.

17. You've mentioned the dual-career family as a common type of family. There are many voices saying that two woking parents have a negative effect on the family life.

1. This is a controversial issue. Some people believe that with two working parents there is possible neglect to the children. Some people believe that there are positive effects: work makes the parents more content with their lives, two incomes lessen the money problems, and the family environment is more peaceful.

17. Can we make a conclusion that the traditional family is a myth?

1. Though changes in society have led to the increase in new varieties of families, there is no indication that people have given up on the traditional family life. The family is still one of the most idealized institutions in the United States, and the changes that have occurred are under constant scrutiny. However, it does seem that Americans are moving away from one specific type of family and have accepted many different types.

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