76 toshilina, popova

VII. DIALOGUES

Dialogue 1

It doesn't sound reasonable

Passenger:

Hello!

C.Officer:

Good morning, Madam! May I have a look at your visa?

Passenger:

Yes, here it is.

C.Officer:

OK. Have you declared everything? Could you have missed any-

Passenger:

thing?

But I have nothing to declare!

C.Officer:

Come on, Madam, everybody's got something to declare.

Passenger:

But I have nothing to declare.

C.Officer:

Since you say you've got nothing to declare, we'll have to exam-

Passenger:

ine your things. Will you please open your baggage?

Well, I don't know...I'm afraid I've lost my key!

C.Officer:

Since you say you've lost your key, we'll have to ruin the pack-

Passenger:

ing.

You can't do it, it's Dior, and it's very expansive!

C.Officer:

I'm very sorry, but I've just done so.

You say you've got nothing to declare, and what's this then? A

Passenger:

gold necklace?

Oh, it's a present for my mother! I've forgot about it!

C.Officer:

And what's this then, cocaine?

Passenger:

That's not mine! I don't know how it got here!

C.Officer:

You'll have to come along with me and have a word with my su-

perior!

Dialogue 2

Incorruptible Customs Officer

C.Officer:

Hello!

Passenger:

Hi!

C.Officer:

Can you give me your passport, please?

Passenger:

Yes, here it is.

C.Officer:

OK. You have no problem with your visa. And where are you

Passenger:

going?

I'm going to the USA to Michigan.

C.Officer:

What is the purpose of your visit?

Passenger:

I'm here on business and I'd like to visit my old friends in

C.Officer:

Michigan.

Did you fill in the declaration form?

Passenger:

Yes, but I'm afraid I have some mistakes. May be you look it

C.Officer:

through?

OK, give me your declaration form, please…No mistakes.

Everything is quite correct. Have you got medicine, guns, drugs

Passenger:

or cigarettes?

No, I haven't, but I have some bottles of collection French wine

C.Officer:

as a present for my friends.

You won't have problem with it because 2 litres of alcohol are

Passenger:

under the limit. Please, put your luggage into the X-ray machine.

OK. Problems?

C.Officer:

Yes, I see 1, 2, 3... 6 bottles on the screen. What does it mean?

Passenger:

You told me only about 2 bottles of wine?!

Passenger:

Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't tell you about Russian Vodka. I have 4

bottles of it. It's for my friends too. They have never been to Rus-

sia and have never tasted Russian Vodka. So I decided it would

C.Officer:

be a good present!

As I see, you don't understand that you are breaking the law. You

Passenger:

didn't declare it.

But I am sure we can find the way out! May be I can present you

C.Officer:

anything?

Are you bribing me!?

Passenger:

Oh, no. You didn't understand me. I don't know the rules. What

C.Officer:

should I do?

You should pay a customs duty... But you didn't tell me about 3

packs of cigarettes. Why? I bought them 5 minutes ago in the

C.Officer:

“Duty Free”.

OK, it's not a problem. So, what should I do now?

Passenger:

You should fill in the declaration form again and go through the

C.Officer:

Red Channel. Now you know the rules and next time you won't

Passenger:

violate the law.

Yes. Thank you a lot. Bye-bye,

C.Officer:

OK. Fill in the declaration form again and have a good stay in

the country. Bye-bye.

Dialogue 3

Lies is always punishable

C.Officer:

Good morning, Madam. Have you got anything to declare?

Passenger:

No, nothing.

C.Officer:

Well, madam. Everybody's got something to declare.

Passenger:

Well, I haven't.

C.Officer:

Have you read this information?

Passenger:

What information? Oh, that one? Yes. Hundreds of times.

C.Officer:

And you still say - nothing to declare? No tobacco products?

Passenger:

No, none at all. I got rid of smoking.

C.Officer:

No alcoholic drinks?

Passenger:

No, none at all. I hate alcohol.

C.Officer:

No fur items?

Passenger:

No, none at all. I'm a Green Peace member.

C.Officer:

No perfume, toilet water?

Passenger:

No, none at all. I'm allergic to perfume.

C.Officer:

Well, madam. I'm afraid; you'll have to open your suitcase any-

C.Officer:

way.

Passenger:

Well...since you ask me so nicely.

C.Officer:

But what's this? A lot of cigarettes, alcohol and perfume.

Passenger:

Oh, that? That is just a few trifles for my colleagues.

C.Officer:

Well, madam. You must remember, when you smuggle things

you lose them. And you pay a fine as well.

Dialogue 4

Cultural heritage

C.Officer:

Good morning. Will you please show me your exit visa?

Passenger:

Just a second. Here it is.

C.Officer:

Do you have any gold items?

Passenger:

Yes, I have some. This ring and a lighter.

C.Officer:

Will you please write them down here?

Passenger:

OK.

C.Officer:

Could you open your traveling bag?

Passenger:

Oh, yes.

C.Officer:

What is there inside this box?

Passenger:

There is some jewellery in it.

C.Officer:

Jewellery?

Passenger:

Yes, a malachite ring and a turquoises bracelet. These semi-pre-

cious stones are very popular in Russia. There is also a set of

C.Officer:

Russian porcelain figures.

Where have you bought them?

Passenger:

In a small souvenir shop in a Russian hotel.

C.Officer:

Very nice. Now will you please put your luggage into the X-ray

machine? Please keep off the machine. Are you sure that you

Passenger:

have declared everything?

Oh, absolutely.

C.Officer:

I'm afraid what you say is not true. I'm asking you again: have

you got anything prohibited for taking out of the country in this

Passenger:

bag?

Please, don't try to frighten me.

C.Officer:

I don't mean to frighten you in any way. I just warn you. And

Passenger:

got? You should declare the amount of your currency in figures

and words.

C.Officer:

Well, I have 2500 $, if I'm not mistaken.

Passenger:

Will you please show me U.S. dollars you've got? I'll count your

money.

C.Officer:

OK.

Passenger:

So you have exactly 3000 $. Please, declare the amount of your

currency in figures and words.

C.Officer:

Just a moment. Well, I've done it.

Passenger:

Would you mind opening your luggage?

C.Officer:

What... any problems?

C.Officer:

I'll have to examine your luggage, madam. Open your luggage,

please! But I'm in a hurry.

Passenger:

Calm down, madam. I won't keep you long.

C.Officer:

(She opens it..)

Passenger:

Well, well... What's this? A golden watch, eh?

C.Officer:

Oh, it's just a little trifle for my sister!

Passenger:

I think that you have missed this...

C.Officer:

I suppose we'll solve this problem. (Trying to give money...)

Passenger:

Are you bribing me?

C.Officer:

No, it's only gratitude to you.

Well, madam. I think you'll have to come along with me and

have a word with my superiors.

Dialogue 7

Guns and cigarettes

C.Officer:

Good morning.

Passenger:

Good morning.

C.Officer:

Please, show me your belongings.

Passenger:

Here they are.

C.Officer:

Do you have goods to declare?

Passenger:

Pardon?

C.Officer:

Do you have goods to declare?!

Passenger:

Oh, I don't think I have.

C.Officer:

Put your bags on the counter, please.

Passenger:

Oh, sorry, can you help me with that?

C.Officer:

Pardon?

Passenger:

Please, help me to hoist my bags!

C.Officer:

Oh, OK.

Passenger:

Thanks.

C.Officer:

Your customs form please Thank you. Have you ever been to

Russia before?

Passenger:

Yeah, several times. It was fantastic! Many beautiful girls, free

C.Officer:

alcohol, cigarettes.

Pardon?

Passenger:

It was once when I came to Russia for work.

C.Officer:

How long are you planning to stay in the country?

Passenger:

Just for the weekend.

C.Officer:

What's the purpose of your visit?

Passenger:

I'm here to have a rest and business, of course.

C.Officer:

I see. Do you have anything to declare?

Passenger:

Pardon?

C. Officer:

I mean guns, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes...

Passenger:

Oh, no. Of course not.

C.Officer:

So, then, what's inside this bag?

Passenger:

Presents for my friends.

C.Officer:

Ha-ha, spirits?

Passenger:

A few bottles of Scottish whisky.

C.Officer:

Any plants?

Passenger:

No, but I have 11 kilos of high quality tobacco.

C.Officer:

What do you mean?

Passenger:

I mean that inside this bag I have 11 kilos of high quality Cuban

C.Officer:

tobacco for my friends.

Oh you need to declare this. That's above the limit! So, now, you

should fill in the declaration form. You can find forms on the

Passenger:

table in the middle of the hall.

Thank you. The problem is -I don't know Russian well enough to

C.Officer:

fill in the declaration form.

There are many dictionaries in different languages. Choose any

Passenger:

you need.. Have you filled in the customs form?

Yes, I have.

C.Officer:

Well, well... Have you got weapons of any kind and

Passenger:

ammunition?

Oh, dear! Why? No!

C.Officer:

And what is that? It is a gun!

Passenger:

Oh, it's a toy for my friend's son!

C.Officer:

Oh then you should write “NO”. Is this your luggage here.

Please, put your suitcase intone X-ray machine. Wait just another

second... Its ОК. You may go. Thank you. Sorry to have kept

Passenger:

you so long.

Thank you for your help.

Dialogue 8

Customs Officer vs. Passenger

C.Officer:

Good Morning! Come this way, please.

Passenger:

Yes, thank you.

C.Officer:

Are these suitcases yours, madam?

Passenger:

Yes, that's right.

C.Officer:

OK, put your bags into the X-ray machine. Oh, you've got so

Passenger:

many bags, for what?

This is my own business.

C.Officer:

By the way, what's the purpose of your visit?

Passenger:

I live in this country. I am coming back after my holyday.

C.Officer:

It's nice.

Passenger:

Yeah, is everything all right with my bags?

C.Officer:

I think it's all right, except this one. What is it?!!

Passenger:

Where?

C.Officer:

What's inside this bag?

Passenger:

Nothing illegal!

C.Officer:

Oh, really, and what about this gun?

Passenger:

It's a toy-gun for my children!

C.Officer:

I don't believe you, you're a terrorist!

Passenger:

What are you talking about?

C.Officer:

Yeah, you're a terrorist.

Passenger:

Listen, you think I look like a terrorist? How could you think so?

C.Officer:

Terrorists never look like terrorists. I'll call the FBI.

Passenger:

No, you're mistaken, you may check it, it's only a toy.

C.Officer:

Maybe you're right OK, do you have anything to declare?

Passenger:

Pardon.

C. Officer:

I mean alcoholic drinks, cigarettes, medicine.

Passenger:

Uhh... no.

C.Officer:

Are you sure?

Passenger:

Well, I bought some Cuban cigars for my friends.

C.Officer:

You don't need to declare them. That's under the limit.

Passenger:

Ohh, that's perfect!

C.Officer:

Please, give me your passport.

Passenger:

Here you are.

C.Officer:

Hmm...

Passenger:

What's the problem?

C.Officer:

Well, I see some difference between the face in the photo and the

Passenger:

face in front of me.

What do you want to say?

C.Officer:

I think it's not your passport.

Passenger:

Oh... You are not right. It's me.