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Babbitt
water-tank in a penthouse. He poked at things with his
toe, and sought to impress her by being learned about
copper gutters, the desirability of passing plumbing pipes
through a lead collar and sleeve and flashing them with
copper, and the advantages of cedar over boiler-iron for
roof-tanks.
You have to know so much, in real estate! she
admired.
He promised that the roof should be repaired within
two days. Do you mind my phoning from your apartment?
he asked.
Heavens, no!
He stood a moment at the coping, looking over a land
of hard little bungalows with abnormally large porches,
and new apartment-houses, small, but brave with variegated
brick walls and terra-cotta trimmings. Beyond them was a
hill with a gouge of yellow clay like a vast wound. Behind
every apartment-house, beside each dwelling, were small
garages. It was a world of good little people, comfortable,
industrious, credulous.
In the autumnal light the flat newness was mellowed,
and the air was a sun-tinted pool.
Golly, its one fine afternoon. You get a great view
here, right up Tanners Hill, said Babbitt.
Yes, isnt it nice and open.
So darn few people appreciate a View.
Dont you go raising my rent on that account! Oh, that
was naughty of me! I was just teasing. Seriously though,
there are so few who respond who react to Views. I
mean they havent any feeling of poetry and beauty.
Thats a fact, they havent, he breathed, admiring her
slenderness and the absorbed, airy way in which she
looked toward the hill, chin lifted, lips smiling. Well,
guess Id better telephone the plumbers, so theyll get on
the job first thing in the morning.
When he had telephoned, making it conspicuously
authoritative and gruff and masculine, he looked doubtful,
and sighed, Spose Id better be
Oh, you must have that cup of tea first!
Well, it would go pretty good, at that.
281

Sinclair Lewis
It was luxurious to loll in a deep green rep chair, his
legs thrust out before him, to glance at the black Chinese
telephone stand and the colored photograph of Mount
Vernon which he had always liked so much, while in the
tiny kitchen so near Mrs Judique sang My Creole
Queen. In an intolerable sweetness, a contentment so
deep that he was wistfully discontented, he saw magnolias
by moonlight and heard plantation darkies crooning to the
banjo. He wanted to be near her, on pretense of helping
her, yet he wanted to remain in this still ecstasy. Languidly
he remained.
When she bustled in with the tea he smiled up at her.
This is awfully nice! For the first time, he was not
fencing; he was quietly and securely friendly; and friendly
and quiet was her answer: Its nice to have you here. You
were so kind, helping me to find this little home.
They agreed that the weather would soon turn cold.
They agreed that prohibition was prohibitive. They agreed
that art in the home was cultural. They agreed about
everything. They even became bold. They hinted that these
modern young girls, well, honestly, their short skirts were
short. They were proud to find that they were not shocked
by such frank speaking. Tanis ventured, I know youll
understand I mean I dont quite know how to say it,
but I do think that girls who pretend theyre bad by the
way they dress really never go any farther. They give away
the fact that they havent the instincts of a womanly
woman.
Remembering Ida Putiak, the manicure girl, and how ill
she had used him, Babbitt agreed with enthusiasm;
remembering how ill all the world had used him, he told
of Paul Riesling, of Zilla, of Seneca Doane, of the strike:
See how it was? Course I was as anxious to have those
beggars licked to a standstill as anybody else, but gosh,
no reason for not seeing their side. For a fellows own
sake, hes got to be broad-minded and liberal, dont you
think so?
Oh, I do! Sitting on the hard little couch, she clasped
her hands beside her, leaned toward him, absorbed him;
and in a glorious state of being appreciated he proclaimed:
282

Babbitt
So I up and said to the fellows at the club, Look
here, I
Do you belong to the Union Club? I think its
No; the Athletic. Tell you: Course theyre always asking
me to join the Union, but I always say, No, sir! Nothing
doing! I dont mind the expense but I cant stand all the
old fogies.
Oh, yes, thats so. But tell me: what did you say to
them?
Oh, you dont want to hear it. Im probably boring you
to death with my troubles! You wouldnt hardly think I
was an old duffer; I sound like a kid!
Oh, youre a boy yet. I mean you cant be a day over
forty-five.
Well, Im not much. But by golly I begin to feel
middle-aged sometimes; all these responsibilities and all.
Oh, I know! Her voice caressed him; it cloaked him
like warm silk. And I feel lonely, so lonely, some days,
Mr Babbitt.
Were a sad pair of birds! But I think were pretty darn
nice!
Yes, I think were lots nicer than most people I know!
They smiled. But please tell me what you said at the
Club.
Well, it was like this: Course Seneca Doane is a friend
of mine they can say what they want to, they can call him
anything they please, but what most folks here dont know
is that Senny is the bosom pal of some of the biggest
statesmen in the world Lord Wycombe, frinstance you
know, this big British nobleman. My friend Sir Gerald Doak
told me that Lord Wycombe is one of the biggest guns in
England well, Doak or somebody told me.
Oh! Do you know Sir Gerald? The one that was here,
at the McKelveys?
Know him? Well, say, I know him just well enough so
we call each other George and Jerry, and we got so
pickled together in Chicago
That must have been fun. But She shook a finger
at him. I cant have you getting pickled! Ill have to
take you in hand!
283

Sinclair Lewis
Wish you would!... Well, zize saying: You see I happen
to know what a big noise Senny Doane is outside of
Zenith, but of course a prophet hasnt got any honor in his
own country, and Senny, darn his old hide, hes so blame
modest that he never lets folks know the kind of an outfit
he travels with when he goes abroad. Well, during the
strike Clarence Drum comes pee-rading up to our table, all
dolled up fit to kill in his nice lil capns uniform, and
somebody says to him, Busting the strike, Clarence?
Well, he swells up like a pouter-pigeon and he hollers,
so s you could hear him way up in the reading-room,
Yes, sure; I told the strike-leaders where they got off, and
so they went home.
Well, I says to him, glad there wasnt any violence.
Yes, he says, but if I hadnt kept my eye skinned
there would ve been. All those fellows had bombs in their
pockets. Theyre reglar anarchists.
Oh, rats, Clarence, I says, I looked em all over
carefully, and they didnt have any more bombs n a
rabbit, I says. Course, I says, theyre foolish, but theyre
a good deal like you and me, after all.
And then Vergil Gunch or somebody no, it was Chum
Frink you know, this famous poet great pal of mine
he says to me, Look here, he says, do you mean to say
you advocate these strikes? Well, I was so disgusted with a
fellow whose mind worked that way that I swear, I had a
good mind to not explain at all just ignore him
Oh, thats so wise! said Mrs Judique.
but finally I explains to him: If youd done as much
as I have on Chamber of Commerce committees and all, I
says, then youd have the right to talk! But same time, I
says, I believe in treating your opponent like a gentleman!
Well, sir, that held em! Frink Chum I always call him
he didnt have another word to say. But at that, I guess
some of em kind o thought I was too liberal. What do
you think?
Oh, you were so wise. And courageous! I love a man
to have the courage of his convictions!
But do you think it was a good stunt? After all, some
of these fellows are so darn cautious and narrow-minded
284

Babbitt
that theyre prejudiced against a fellow that talks right out
in meeting.
What do you care? In the long run theyre bound to
respect a man who makes them think, and with your
reputation for oratory you
What do you know about my reputation for oratory?
Oh, Im not going to tell you everything I know! But
seriously, you dont realize what a famous man you are.
Well Though I havent done much orating this fall.
Too kind of bothered by this Paul Riesling business, I
guess. But Do you know, youre the first person thats
really understood what I was getting at, Tanis Listen to
me, will you! Fat nerve Ive got, calling you Tanis!
Oh, do! And shall I call you George? Dont you think its
awfully nice when two people have so much what shall
I call it? so much analysis that they can discard all these
stupid conventions and understand each other and become
acquainted right away, like ships that pass in the night?
I certainly do! I certainly do!
He was no longer quiescent in his chair; he wandered
about the room, he dropped on the couch beside her. But
as he awkwardly stretched his hand toward her fragile,
immaculate fingers, she said brightly, Do give me a
cigarette. Would you think poor Tanis was dreadfully
naughty if she smoked?
Lord, no! I like it!
He had often and weightily pondered flappers smoking
in Zenith restaurants, but he knew only one woman who
smoked Mrs Sam Doppelbrau, his flighty neighbor. He
ceremoniously lighted Taniss cigarette, looked for a place
to deposit the burnt match, and dropped it into his pocket.
Im sure you want a cigar, you poor man! she crooned.
Do you mind one?
Oh, no! I love the smell of a good cigar; so nice and
so nice and like a man. Youll find an ash-tray in my
bedroom, on the table beside the bed, if you dont mind
getting it.
He was embarrassed by her bedroom: the broad couch
with a cover of violet silk, mauve curtains striped with gold.
Chinese Chippendale bureau, and an amazing row of slippers,
285

Sinclair Lewis
with ribbon-wound shoe-trees, and primrose stockings lying
across them. His manner of bringing the ash-tray had just
the right note of easy friendliness, he felt. A boob like Verg
Gunch would try to get funny about seeing her bedroom,
but I take it casually. He was not casual afterward. The
contentment of companionship was gone, and he was
restless with desire to touch her hand. But whenever he
turned toward her, the cigarette was in his way. It was a
shield between them. He waited till she should have
finished, but as he rejoiced at her quick crushing of its light
on the ashtray she said, Dont you want to give me another
cigarette? and hopelessly he saw the screen of pale smoke
and her graceful tilted hand again between them. He was
not merely curious now to find out whether she would let
him hold her hand (all in the purest friendship, naturally),
but agonized with need of it.
On the surface appeared none of all this fretful drama.
They were talking cheerfully of motors, of trips to California,
of Chum Frink. Once he said delicately, I do hate these
guys I hate these people that invite themselves to meals,
but I seem to have a feeling Im going to have supper with
the lovely Mrs Tanis Judique to-night. But I suppose you
probably have seven dates already.
Well, I was thinking some of going to the movies. Yes,
I really think I ought to get out and get some fresh air.
She did not encourage him to stay, but never did she
discourage him. He considered, I better take a sneak! She
WILL let me stay there IS something doing and I
mustnt get mixed up with I mustnt Ive got to beat it.
Then, No. its too late now.
Suddenly, at seven, brushing her cigarette away, brusquely
taking her hand:
Tanis! Stop teasing me! You know we Here we are,
a couple of lonely birds, and were awful happy together.
Anyway I am! Never been so happy! Do let me stay! Ill
gallop down to the delicatessen and buy some stuff cold
chicken maybe or cold turkey and we can have a nice
little supper, and afterwards, if you want to chase me out,
Ill be good and go like a lamb.
Well yes it would be nice, she said.
286

Babbitt
Nor did she withdraw her hand. He squeezed it,
trembling, and blundered toward his coat. At the delicatessen
he bought preposterous stores of food, chosen on the
principle of expensiveness. From the drug store across the
street he telephoned to his wife, Got to get a fellow to
sign a lease before he leaves town on the midnight. Wont
be home till late. Dont wait up for me. Kiss Tinka goodnight. He expectantly lumbered back to the flat.
Oh, you bad thing, to buy so much food! was her
greeting, and her voice was gay, her smile acceptant.
He helped her in the tiny white kitchen; he washed the
lettuce, he opened the olive bottle. She ordered him to set
the table, and as he trotted into the living-room, as he
hunted through the buffet for knives and forks, he felt
utterly at home.
Now the only other thing, he announced, is what
youre going to wear. I cant decide whether youre to put
on your swellest evening gown, or let your hair down and
put on short skirts and make-believe youre a little girl.
Im going to dine just as I am, in this old chiffon rag,
and if you cant stand poor Tanis that way, you can go to
the club for dinner!
Stand you! He patted her shoulder. Child, youre the
brainiest and the loveliest and finest woman Ive ever met!
Come now, Lady Wycombe, if youll take the Duke of
Zeniths arm, we will proambulate in to the magnolious
feed!
Oh, you do say the funniest, nicest things!
When they had finished the picnic supper he thrust his
head out of the window and reported, Its turned awful
chilly, and I think its going to rain. You dont want to go
to the movies.
Well
I wish we had a fireplace! I wish it was raining like all
get-out to-night, and we were in a funny little old-fashioned
cottage, and the trees thrashing like everything outside,
and a great big log fire and Ill tell you! Lets draw this
couch up to the radiator, and stretch our feet out, and
pretend its a wood-fire.
Oh, I think thats pathetic! You big child!
287

Sinclair Lewis
But they did draw up to the radiator, and propped their
feet against it his clumsy black shoes, her patent-leather
slippers. In the dimness they talked of themselves; of how
lonely she was, how bewildered he, and how wonderful
that they had found each other. As they fell silent the
room was stiller than a country lane. There was no sound
from the street save the whir of motor-tires, the rumble of
a distant freight-train. Self-contained was the room, warm,
secure, insulated from the harassing world.
He was absorbed by a rapture in which all fear and
doubting were smoothed away; and when he reached
home, at dawn, the rapture had mellowed to contentment
serene and full of memories.
Chapter XXIX
I
The assurance of Tanis Judiques friendship fortified
Babbitts self-approval. At the Athletic Club he became
experimental. Though Vergil Gunch was silent, the others
at the Roughnecks Table came to accept Babbitt as having,
for no visible reason, turned crank. They argued windily
with him, and he was cocky, and enjoyed the spectacle of
his interesting martyrdom. He even praised Seneca Doane.
Professor Pumphrey said that was carrying a joke too far;
but Babbitt argued, No! Fact! I tell you hes got one of the
keenest intellects in the country. Why, Lord Wycombe said
that
Oh, who the hell is Lord Wycombe? What you always
lugging him in for? You been touting him for the last six
weeks! protested Orville Jones.
George ordered him from Sears-Roebuck. You can get
those English high-muckamucks by mail for two bucks
apiece, suggested Sidney Finkelstein.
Thats all right now! Lord Wycombe, hes one of the
biggest intellects in English political life. As I was saying:
Of course Im conservative myself, but I appreciate a guy
like Senny Doane because
288

Babbitt
Vergil Gunch interrupted harshly, I wonder if you are
so conservative? I find I can manage to run my own
business without any skunks and reds like Doane in it!
The grimness of Gunchs voice, the hardness of his jaw,
disconcerted Babbitt, but he recovered and went on till
they looked bored, then irritated, then as doubtful as
Gunch.
II
He thought of Tanis always. With a stir he remembered
her every aspect. His arms yearned for her. Ive found her!
Ive dreamed of her all these years and now Ive found
her! he exulted. He met her at the movies in the morning;
he drove out to her flat in the late afternoon or on
evenings when he was believed to be at the Elks. He
knew her financial affairs and advised her about them,
while she lamented her feminine ignorance, and praised
his masterfulness, and proved to know much more about
bonds than he did. They had remembrances, and laughter
over old times. Once they quarreled, and he raged that
she was as bossy as his wife and far more whining when
he was inattentive. But that passed safely.
Their high hour was a tramp on a ringing December
afternoon, through snow-drifted meadows down to the icy
Chaloosa River. She was exotic in an astrachan cap and a
short beaver coat; she slid on the ice and shouted, and he
panted after her, rotund with laughter... Myra Babbitt never
slid on the ice.
He was afraid that they would be seen together. In
Zenith it is impossible to lunch with a neighbors wife
without the fact being known, before nightfall, in every
house in your circle. But Tanis was beautifully discreet.
However appealingly she might turn to him when they
were alone, she was gravely detached when they were
abroad, and he hoped that she would be taken for a
client. Orville Jones once saw them emerging from a movie
theater, and Babbitt bumbled, Let me make you quainted
with Mrs Judique. Now heres a lady who knows the right
broker to come to, Orvy! Mr Jones, though he was a man
289

Sinclair Lewis
censorious of morals and of laundry machinery, seemed
satisfied.
His predominant fear not from any especial fondness
for her but from the habit of propriety was that his wife
would learn of the affair. He was certain that she knew
nothing specific about Tanis, but he was also certain that
she suspected something indefinite. For years she had
been bored by anything more affectionate than a farewell
kiss, yet she was hurt by any slackening in his irritable
periodic interest, and now he had no interest; rather, a
revulsion. He was completely faithful to Tanis. He was
distressed by the sight of his wifes slack plumpness, by
her puffs and billows of flesh, by the tattered petticoat
which she was always meaning and always forgetting to
throw away. But he was aware that she, so long attuned
to him, caught all his repulsions. He elaborately, heavily,
jocularly tried to check them. He couldnt.
They had a tolerable Christmas. Kenneth Escott was
there, admittedly engaged to Verona. Mrs Babbitt was
tearful and called Kenneth her new son. Babbitt was
worried about Ted, because he had ceased complaining of
the State University and become suspiciously acquiescent.
He wondered what the boy was planning, and was too
shy to ask. Himself, Babbitt slipped away on Christmas
afternoon to take his present, a silver cigarette-box, to
Tanis. When he returned Mrs Babbitt asked, much too
innocently, Did you go out for a little fresh air?
Yes, just lil drive, he mumbled.
After New Years his wife proposed, I heard from my
sister to-day, George. She isnt well. I think perhaps I
ought to go stay with her for a few weeks.
Now, Mrs Babbitt was not accustomed to leave home
during the winter except on violently demanding occasions,
and only the summer before, she had been gone for
weeks. Nor was Babbitt one of the detachable husbands
who take separations casually He liked to have her there;
she looked after his clothes; she knew how his steak
ought to be cooked; and her clucking made him feel
secure. But he could not drum up even a dutiful Oh, she
doesnt really need you, does she? While he tried to look
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