XI. Прочтите и перескажите своим друзьям английские шутки:

One morning the king stoops down over the basin to wash his face. The jester can’t stand the temptation and kicks the king. It is an inexcusable insult. The king gets furious and orders to execute the jester. A few minutes before the execution the king feels sorry for the jester and tells him that he will pardon him if he makes such an excuse that will be more impudent than the insult itself. The jester thinks a little and says, “I’m sorry, Your Majesty! But I thought it was the queen”.

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The jester can’t stand the temptation… – (зд.) Шут не может противостоять соблазну…

to kick smb – ударить кого-либо ногой

an inexcusable insult – непростительное оскорбление

to get furious – прийти в ярость

to execute smb – казнить кого-либо

execution – казнь

to pardon smb – помиловать кого-либо

impudent – наглый, нахальный

Your Majesty! – Ваше Величество! (обращение к королю)

* * *

Believe it or not, but…

… in Oklahoma, USA, the judge may sentence you to prison if you tease a dog.

… in Alaska it is illegal to throw a living deer out of a flying plane.

… in Connecticut it is illegal to cross the street on your hands.

… in Florida there is a law which forbids unmarried women to jump with a parachute on Sundays otherwise the police may arrest them, fine them or the judge may send them to prison.

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to tease – дразнить

a living deer – живой олень

to forbid – запрещать

an unmarried woman – незамужняя женщина

otherwise – иначе, в противном случае

* * *

“Why are you in prison?”

“Just imagine! It turns out one day that the state manufactures the same banknotes as I do!”

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Just imagine! – Только представьте себе!

It turns out one day… - (зд.) в один прекрасный день выясняется…

XII. Прочтите и переведите текст:

THE OLD VIOLIN

A poor young man goes to an old things shop and says: “I want to sell my violin. I’m ill and I need money.” The old kind shop-assistant feels sorry for the young man and gives him three dollars for the violin.

A few days later another man looking very rich comes to the shop. He sees the violin and is very surprised. He says: “This is Stradivarius! Give the young man two hundred dollars for it! And you can have fifty dollars if you help me to buy it for me!”

When the poor young man comes to the shop, the shop-assistant gives him two hundred dollars for his violin. But the rich man doesn’t come back! The shop-assistant takes the violin to a specialist. The specialist says: “It’s a common, cheap violin. It costs three dollars! Don’t you see? Those two men are partners.”

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a violin – скрипка

a shop-assistant – продавец

common – обыкновенный

XIII. Ответьте на вопросы:

1. Where does a young man go?

2 .How much money does the shop-assistant give the young man?

3. Who came a few days later?

4. Want did the rich man ask?

5. Who were those two people?