99.75 Points. Number two receives zero. Number one wins.

(Lily cries and runs off stage.)

Heizi: Lily!

Hong Hong: The young man runs off stage with Lily, grabs her hand and says,

"Don't cry. I know you're the best." Lily suddenly falls into the young

man's arms.

Heizi: Really? !

(Hong Hong nods. Heizi pursues Lily off stage.)

Hong Hong: The young man strokes Lily's hair and says gently, "Don't cry,

silly child . . . "

Toothbrush: Stop already.

(Hong Hong pays no attention to him, and continues)

Hong Hong: "Let me handle all the problems in the future, so long as we're

together . . ."

Daxian: Cut! Roll credits and sponsors. That's a wrap.

(Hong Hong stops, moves off from the square.)

Toothbrush: No way. I don't believe Malu's life can be more exciting than a

soap opera.

Act XVIII

Malu: I said that if I can't force myself to be calm, to temper my worship

of you, then I couldn't see you again. Now I can do it. Before, I didn't

think that a person's desires could change the colour of the sky, the shape

of an object or, cause a dream to be tangible. But now I know it's because

my desires weren't strong enough. Mingming, please never be mad with me

again, maybe I'm just a natural born lunatic.

Mingming: Is it raining outside?

Malu: Doesn't look like it yet.

Mingming: Still not?

Malu: But everyone on the street is carrying umbrellas.

Mingming: They never look at the sky. They just listen for the chance of

rain on the news. How stuffy it's become. The thunder's been rolling for so

long and still no rain! This kind of weather always gives me cravings; I can

never settle down. Life always returns to the way it was. Each day my

physical strength is sapped from merely walking from this end of the room to

the other end. I'm starting to have difficulty sleeping well. I'm full of

desire from head to foot. It's not because I have feelings for a man, but

because I desire one. Because of this desire I don't know if I'm coming or

going, and I can't sleep. It's terrible! I already can't bear to be alone or

pass one tranquil night after another. My body is in turmoil. That patch of

lawn has been wet from the 31st until today, a total of seven days. It's too

terrible.

Malu: Are you sick? How many days have you not gone to work?

Mingming: It doesn't matter. I'll see it through. My manager is quite

partial to me. Talk to me a bit. How is your Tula?

Malu: Not too good. Doesn't want to move and is eating less than before.

Some people are very easily frightened when you approach them. Maybe it's

old, but it's only 20 years old, it's only a middle-aged rhinoceros.

Mingming: Maybe it's lovesickness.

Malu: Maybe I gave it to him.

(Mingming smiles.)

Mingming: This . . . I want to give you this. (Puts the wallet from that

night into Malu's hand. Malu looks at it in disbelief, puts it up to his

nose and sniffs.) That day was Chen Fei's birthday. I waited long into the

night for him to come but he never came. At that point I gave everything to

you: The cake, the present and my passion.

Malu: You're saying I wasn't dreaming?

Mingming: Just believe you were dreaming, all those things don't belong to

you anyway.

Malu: Then what about yesterday? Yesterday evening?

Mingming: What about yesterday evening?

Malu: You came to me? Or did you not?

Mingming: What are you talking about?

Malu: Damn. You've messed me up! How can you do that? !

Mingming: Are you referring to that night?

Malu: Right.

Mingming: You didn't like it?

Malu: No! I really don't know if it's you who is crazy or if it's me.

Mingming: It's not important. It's all finished now.

Malu: What's finished is you and that guy. Now we can begin.

Mingming: There is no "we." Afterward there's only "me."

Malu: I won't leave you, and I won't let you leave me.

Mingming: Don't try to compete with me in speaking sweet nothings.

Malu: Wait and see, just wait and see.

Act XIX

Malu has cleaned himself up and is dressed nicely. Heizi and Daxian stand

beside him.

Malu: All white things become as black as ink and feel inferior next to you.

All ignorant birds and beasts are in extreme despair since they can't speak

your name . . . . .

Heizi: How long are you going to repeat those two lines?

Daxian: He just finished writing them. He hasn't figured out what comes next

so all he can do is mumble them over and over again.

Heizi: How boring. Listening to it makes my ears itch. (Pulls out a match

and picks at his ear) Don't touch me! Move away from me a bit.

Daxian: Don't worry. I won't touch you.

Heizi: Then move away from me a bit, you make me nervous.

Malu: (Finally comes up with the next line) At each intersection the police

change the light to green in order to let you pass throughЎK

Daxian: (Taps Heizi with his arm) Hey, that's not bad.

Heizi: (Shouts) Oww! I told you not to touch me!

Daxian: I forgot.

Heizi: You forgot! I'm going to be deaf! Don't touch me again!

Daxian: Won't happen.

(Heizi doesn't trust him and moves off a ways. Toothbrush runs in madly.)

Toothbrush: Another one's gone crazy, another one. Daxian, do you know what

happened. Heizi! (Heizi stands with his back toward the others, picking his

ear. Toothbrush smacks him on the back. Heizi cries out painfully.

Toothbrush pays him no attention) Malu! Do you know? Do you know?

Daxian: Who's gone crazy? You?

Toothbrush: Hong Hong.

Heizi: (Covers his ears and comes over. From now on he always picks at his

ear as if he can't hear. In a loud voice.) Who?

Toothbrush: Quiet!

Heizi: What did you say?

Toothbrush: Quiet down! Early this morning Hong Hong came to find me and

poured out her heart -- she's fallen in love with Malu! The whole morning I

was selling eyebrow tweezers and wherever I went she followed me, I nearly

plucked her eyebrows clean off . . . . . . (Imitating Hong Hong) "Tell me

again, tell me again! Tell me how impressive Malu's eyebrows are, how

attractive his teeth are, how sexy his leg hair is" . . . Malu's sickness

hasn't been cured, and now she's gone crazy too.

Daxian: That's to say Malu isn't only sick, but also contagious. (Smiles)

Heizi: What's so funny? If I have to listen to him sing that song again I'm

going to go crazy myself. I'm leaving.

(From outside the gate Hong Hong calls out, " Malu, it's me, Hong Hong.")

Toothbrush: Forget it. The lunatic is here. I'm gone.

Daxian: I'm also out of here.

(The group exits. Enter Hong Hong. She acts out the scene of delivering food

to Malu on a rainy day and injuring her leg as she slips and falls onto the

road.)

Malu: Why did you come here again? !

Hong Hong: Our story still hasn't come to its end.

Malu: Didn't I already tell you that I'm not interested in your story! This

nonsense of delivering food in the rain and slipping, this injuring your leg

. . .

Hong Hong: If you don't like it we can change it to another kind of story!

No matter what this story is better than the one where you save the child

and get hit by the truck, isn't it?

Malu: Why do I have to get hit by a truck?

Hong Hong: That's just one possibility, in life, anything can happen.

Malu: You're saying that anything can happen in a soap opera.

Hong Hong: What's more, maybe you'll wake up tomorrow morning and find that

you love me the most.

Malu: You're joking.

Hong Hong: The audience won't like you if you don't change your lovers. Or

you'll become more miserable when you realize that the secretary you love

has no sense of honour, looks up to the rich but down upon the poor, lives

above her means, ends up having an affair with her boss; that's when you'll

learn from the painful experience that Hong Hong is as pure as the driven

snow . . . . . .

Malu: Nonsense!

Hong Hong: How is it nonsense?

Malu: Spare me the suffering of your vulgar soap operas! Don't you ever dare

slander Mingming with that pack of lies again.

Hong Hong: How did I slander her? Just a moment ago when I came up here I

saw her getting out of some guy's Mercedes with my own eyes. In her hand she

was holding a big gift. He looked like he was older than her big brother,

but younger than her father. She told me herself that he was her boss.

Malu: She spoke to you?

Hong Hong: I only care about how the plot develops, so naturally I asked her

a few questions. She admitted that they were lovers, and added that he has a

wife.

Malu: Life can really imitate a soap opera.

Hong Hong: Life always imitates soap operas. If you don't believe me you can

go ask her yourself. She's become so used to it she doesn't even try to hide