English Grammar Workbook for "dummies" - Geraldine Woods
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224 Part IV: All You Need to Know about Descriptions and Comparisons
Pembroke Diner: You Won’t Go Broke, but You Won’t Eat Well Either
A recent meal at the Pembroke Diner on 48th Street was most
distressing the most distressing experience I’ve had since becoming
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a restaurant critic. First of all, the tables are as close together, if not
closer together, than bus riders during rush hour as close together
27 as bus riders during rush hour, if not closer. I truly did not want to hear
my neighbors’ conversation about their grandchildren, who are, they claim,
so smart that no IQ test can measure them. Nor did I want to chew
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each bite of steak for ten minutes because the steak was tougher than
any other meat I’ve eaten in my life. The wine list of the Pembroke is the
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least interesting of all the restaurants in the universe that serve wine.
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I am, I admit, a wine snob, but even people who drink wine only once a
year will have a hard time finding something that is as watery, if not more
watery, than the house red as watery as the house red, if not more
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watery. I was surprised to realize that I was less impressed than the other
32 diners munching happily in the restaurant. Surely the Pembroke can do
better! The potato was much more raw than an uncooked steak and
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more expensive than filet mignon. I recommend that you find a place
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with better food. The Pembroke must revise its menu and its habits
immediately, or the restaurant will be so unpopular that it will go out of
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business.
AThe expression most distressing must be placed in context. Your answer probably differs from mine, but as long as it indicates the context, you’re okay.
B If you’re doubling a comparison, each separate comparison must be complete.
C A so statement must be accompanied by a that statement in order to complete the comparison.
D Steak is a meat, so the word other must be inserted.
E Your completion may be different from mine, but the context of least interesting must appear.
F Each element of a double comparison must be complete.
GThe critic is clearly a diner, and he or she cannot be less impressed than himor herself. Insert other and the logic is saved.
Chapter 17: Apples and Oranges: Improper Comparisons 225
HYou can correct this comparison in about a zillion ways. I’ve provided one possibility, but anything you come up with is fine so long as the comparison is complete.
IThis comparison must be completed. I supply an answer, but don’t worry if yours is different. Just be sure it’s complete.
J The so statement can’t make a comparison all by itself; a that statement must be appended.
226 Part IV: All You Need to Know about Descriptions and Comparisons
Part V
Writing with Style
In this part . . .
Completing the exercises in this part is the equivalent of designing clothes for one of the famous Parisian
fashion houses. If you can make it through this material, you’ve arrived at the top. The topics in this part include more than grammar; and when you master them, your writing will be as stylish as a supermodel.
Chapter 18 tackles parallelism, the grammar term for order and balance in a sentence. (In fashion terms, how not to wear rain boots with an evening gown.) Chapter 19 lets you practice adding variety to sentences, so you don’t end up wearing the same outfit . . . er, structuring every sentence the same way. Chapter 20 concerns the little errors (like wearing something that isn’t black in New York City) that sabotage your writing.
Chapter 18
Practicing Parallel Structure
In This Chapter
Creating balanced sentences
Avoiding shifts in tense, person, and voice
Dealing with paired conjunctions (either/or, not only/but also, and the like)
Math teachers have all the luck. Not only can they play with compasses and protractors, but they also get to draw little circles and squares and parallel lines. English has
parallels too, but in grammar, parallels are created with words, not with pencils and rulers. No fun at all!
Grammatical parallelism may not be party material, but it’s essential to good writing. Parallelism refers to order and balance, the quality a sentence has when it flows smoothly. No parallel sentence starts out in one direction (toward, say, Grandma’s house) only to veer suddenly off the road (perhaps to a biker convention two states away). This chapter provides a road map and some practice drives to keep your sentences on track.
Geometry Invades English: Parallelism Basics
When a sentence is parallel, everything performing the same function in the sentence has the same grammatical identity. If you have two subjects, for example, and one is an infinitive (to ski), the other one will be an infinitive also (to fracture). You can’t mix and match; to ski and fracturing shouldn’t show up as paired (or part of tripled or quadrupled or whatever) subjects. Check these sentences out:
Nonparallel: Roberta didn’t enjoy paying full price for a lift ticket and that the cashier treated her rudely.
Parallel: Roberta didn’t enjoy paying full price for a lift ticket and being treated rudely by the cashier.
In checking for parallelism, don’t worry about terminology. Just read the sentence aloud and listen: Parallel sentences sound balanced, but nonparallel sentences sound lopsided.
Keep your balance while you check out the following sentences. Decide whether or not they’re parallel. If they are, write “correct” in the blank after each sentence. If they’re nonparallel, correct the sentence in the blanks provided.
230 Part V: Writing with Style
Q. Sliding down Thunder Mountain, artfully spraying snow across his rival’s face, and to get the best seat in the ski lodge were Robert’s goals for the afternoon.
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A. Sliding down Thunder Mountain, artfully spraying snow across his rival’s face, and getting the best seat in the ski lodge were Robert’s goals for the afternoon. The sentence has three subjects. The first two subjects are verb forms ending in -ing (gerunds, in official grammar terminology), but the third is an infinitive (the to form of a verb). Mismatch! My suggested answer makes all three subjects into gerunds. Here’s another possibility: To slide down Thunder Mountain, to spray snow artfully across his rival’s face, and to get the best seat in the ski lodge were Robert’s goals for the afternoon. Now all are infinitives, and the sentence is parallel.
1. The ski pants that Robert favors are green, skin-tight, and made of stretch fabric.
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2. When he eases into those pants and zipping up with great difficulty, Robert feels cool.
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3. In this ski outfit, Robert can breathe only with great difficulty and loudly.
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4.The sacrifice for the sake of fashion is worth the trouble and how he feels uncomfortable, Robert says.
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5.Besides, sliding down the mountain and coasting to a full stop is easier in clothing that resembles a second skin.
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6.Robert has often been known to object to secondhand clothing and how some equipment is used.
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Chapter 18: Practicing Parallel Structure 231
7. “With a good parka or wearing a warm face mask I’m ready for anything,” he says.
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8. He adds, “The face mask is useful on the slopes and doing double duty in bank robberies.”
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9. The ski pants can also be recycled, if they are ripless and without stains.
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10. However, robbing a bank and to mug someone on the street is more difficult in ski pants.
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11. Robbers need speed and to be private, but they also need pockets.
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12. Stashing stolen money and where to put an unwanted ski mask are important issues.
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13.Robert, who is actually quite honest and not having the inclination to rob anyone, nevertheless thinks about crime and fashion.
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14. He once wrote and had even edited a newsletter called Crimes of Fashion.
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15. Skiing and to pursue a career in law enforcement are Robert’s dreams.
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232 Part V: Writing with Style
Avoiding Unnecessary Shifts
in Tense, Person, and Voice
My driving instructor (my husband) patiently explained to me at least 1,000 times that shifting at the wrong time was bad for (a) the engine and (b) his nerves. I did my best, though the grinding noise that echoed through the car wasn’t always my teeth.
Sentences should stay in gear also, unless the meaning requires a shift. Every sentence has tense (the time of the action or state of being), person (who’s talking or being talked about), and voice (active or passive). A sentence has a parallelism problem when one of those qualities shifts unnecessarily from, say, present to past tense, or from first person (the I form) to third (the he or they form). Nor should a sentence drift from singular to plural without good reason. For help with verbs, check out Chapters 1 and 2. Pronoun tips are in Chapters 3 and 11.
Some shifts are crucial to the meaning of the sentence. If I hit you and then he hits me, the shift from one person to another is part of what I’m trying to say. That sort of sentence is fine. What’s not parallel is a statement like I hit him because you always want to be aggressive in tight situations, where the you is a stand-in for I or everyone.
Hop in for a test ride. Check out the following sentences. If everything’s okay, write “correct” in the blank after each sentence. Rewrite the nonparallel sentences so they’re correct.
Q. Miranda read her introduction, and then the slides of our trip to Morocco were shown by me.
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A. Miranda read her introduction, and then I showed the slides of our trip to Morocco.
The original sentence unwisely shifts from active voice (Miranda read) to passive (slides . . . were shown). Verdict: Stripped gears, caused by a lack of parallelism.
16.If anyone has studied biology, you know that a person must learn the names of hundreds, if not thousands, of organisms.
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17. Who gave those names, and why?
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18.The Amoeba Family provides a good example of the process, so its name will be explained.
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Chapter 18: Practicing Parallel Structure 233
19.You may not know that the first example of this single-celled organism would have the name Amy.
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20. When you split them in half, the new organisms name themselves.
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21.The right half of Amy was still called Amy by herself, but the left half now called herself Bea.
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22. The next time Amy and Bea split, you have four new organisms.
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23.No one can imagine a conference between four single-celled organisms unless they witnessed it.
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24. Amy Right Half favored a name that people will notice.
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25. Amy Left Half thought about the choice for so long that her swimming was neglected.
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26.Bea Right Half, a proto-feminist, opted for “Amy-Bea,” because she wants to honor both her parents.
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27.Everyone always pronounced “Amy-Bea” very fast, and soon “Amoeba” was their preferred spelling.
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