The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations

I suppose that the high-water mark of my youth in Columbus, Ohio, was the night the bed fell on my father.

‘My Life and Hard Times’ (1933) ch. 1

Her own mother lived the latter years of her life in the horrible suspicion that electricity was dripping invisibly all over the house.

‘My Life and Hard Times’ (1933) ch. 2

You might as well fall flat on your face as lean over too far backward.

‘The Bear Who Let It Alone’ in ‘New Yorker’ 29 April 1939

There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else.

‘The Fairly Intelligent Fly’ in ‘New Yorker’ 4 February 1939

You can fool too many of the people too much of the time.

‘The Owl who was God’ in ‘New Yorker’ 29 April 1939

Then, with that faint fleeting smile playing about his lips, he faced the firing squad; erect and motionless, proud and disdainful, Walter Mitty, the undefeated, inscrutable to the last.

‘The Secret Life of Walter Mitty’ in ‘New Yorker’ 18 March 1939

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.

‘The Shrike and the Chipmunks’ in ‘New Yorker’ 18 February 1939

All right, have it your own way—you heard a seal bark!

Cartoon caption in ‘New Yorker’ 30 January 1932

That’s my first wife up there and this is the present Mrs Harris.

Cartoon caption in ‘New Yorker’ 16 March 1933

The war between men and women.

Cartoon series title in ‘New Yorker’ 20 January-28 April 1934

It’s a naïve domestic Burgundy without any breeding, but I think you’ll be amused by its presumption.

Cartoon caption in ‘New Yorker’ 27 March 1937

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone?

Cartoon caption in ‘New Yorker’ 5 June 1937

It’s our own story exactly! He bold as a hawk, she soft as the dawn.

Cartoon caption in ‘New Yorker’ 25 February 1939

Humour is emotional chaos remembered in tranquillity.

In ‘New York Post’ 29 February 1960.

8.44 Edward, First Baron Thurlow 1731-1806

Corporations have neither bodies to be punished, nor souls to be condemned, they therefore do as they like.

In Poynder ‘Literary Extracts’ (1844) vol. 1 (usually quoted as ‘Did you ever expect a corporation to have a conscience, when it has no soul to be damned, and no body to be kicked?’)

8.45 Edward, Second Baron Thurlow 1781-1829

Nature is always wise in every part.

‘To a Bird, that haunted the Waters of Lacken, in the Winter’

8.46 Tibullus c.50-19 B.C.

Te spectem, suprema mihi cum venerit hora, Et teneam moriens deficiente manu.

May I be looking at you when my last hour has come, and dying may I hold you with my

weakening hand.

‘Elegies’ bk. 1, no. 1, l. 59

Te propter nullos tellus tua postulat imbres, Arida nec pluvio supplicat herba Iovi.

Because of you your land never pleads for showers, nor does its parched grass pray to Jupiter

the Rain-giver.

‘Elegies’ bk. 1, no. 7, l. 25 (referring to the Nile in Egypt)

8.47 Chidiock Tichborne c.1558-86

My prime of youth is but a frost of cares; My feast of joy is but a dish of pain;

My crop of corn is but a field of tares; And all my good is but vain hope of gain. The day is past, and yet I saw no sun; And now I live, and now my life is done.

‘Elegy’ (composed in the Tower of London before his execution)

8.48 Thomas Tickell 1686-1740

There taught us how to live; and (oh! too high The price for knowledge) taught us how to die.

‘Epitaph. On the Death of Mr Addison’ l. 81, in Tickell’s edition of Addison’s Works (1721) preface, p. xx

8.49 Paul Tillich 1886-1965

Neurosis is the way of avoiding non-being by avoiding being.

‘The Courage To Be’ (1952) pt. 2, ch. 3

He who knows about depth knows about God.

‘The Shaking of the Foundations’ (1948) ch. 7

8.50 Matthew Tindal 1657-1733

Matters of fact, which as Mr Budgell somewhere observes, are very stubborn things.

‘The Will of Matthew Tindal’ (1733) p. 23

8.51 Dion Titheradge

eat: it was a hobbit-hole, and that means comfort.

‘The Hobbit’ (1937) ch. 1

One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them

One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.

‘The Lord of the Rings’ (1954-5) pt. 1 ‘The Fellowship of the Ring’ (1954) epigraph

8.57 Leo Tolstoy 1828-1910

All happy families resemble one another, but each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

‘Anna Karenina’ (1875-7) pt. 1, ch. 1 (translated by Maude)

It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness.

‘The Kreutzer Sonata’ 5 (translated by Maude)

Our body is a machine for living. It is organized for that, it is its nature. Let life go on in it unhindered and let it defend itself, it will do more than if you paralyse it by encumbering it with remedies.

‘War and Peace’ (1868-9) bk. 10, ch. 29 (translated by A. and L. Maude).

Pure and complete sorrow is as impossible as pure and complete joy.

‘War and Peace’ (1868-9) bk. 15, ch. 1

Art is not a handicraft, it is the transmission of feeling the artist has experienced.

‘What is Art?’ (1898) ch. 19 (translated by Maude)

I sit on a man’s back, choking him and making him carry me, and yet assure myself and others that I am very sorry for him and wish to ease his lot by all possible means—except by getting off his back.

‘What Then Must We Do?’ (1886) ch. 16 (translated by Maude)

8.58 Nicholas Tomalin

The only qualities for real success in journalism are ratlike cunning, a plausible manner and a little literary ability.

‘Sunday Times Magazine’ 26 October 1969 (where the phrase ratlike cunning is attributed to Murray Sayle)

8.59 Barry Took and Marty Feldman

Hello, I’m Julian and this is my friend, Sandy.

Catch-phrase in ‘Round the Horne’ (BBC radio series, 1965-8)

8.60 Cyril Tourneur c.1575-1626

Does the silk-worm expend her yellow labours For thee? for thee does she undo herself?

‘The Revenger’s Tragedy’ (1607) act 3, sc. 5, l. 71

8.61 Pete Townshend 1945—

Hope I die before I get old.

‘My Generation’ (1965 song)

8.62 Thomas Traherne c.1637-74

You never enjoy the world aright, till the sea itself floweth in your veins, till you are clothed with the heavens, and crowned with the stars: and perceive yourself to be the sole heir of the whole world, and more than so, because men are in it who are every one sole heirs as well as you. Till you can sing and rejoice and delight in God, as misers do in gold, and kings in sceptres, you never enjoy the world.

‘Centuries of Meditations’ Century 1, 29

The corn was orient and immortal wheat, which never should be reaped, nor was ever sown. I thought it had stood from everlasting to everlasting.

‘Centuries of Meditations’ Century 3, 3

The Men! O what venerable and reverend creatures did the aged seem! Immortal Cherubims! And young men glittering and sparkling Angels, and maids strange seraphic pieces of life and beauty! Boys and girls tumbling in the street, and playing, were moving jewels. I knew not that they were born or should die; but all things abided eternally as they were in their proper places.

‘Centuries of Meditations’ Century 3, 3

The hands are a sort of feet, which serve us in our passage towards Heaven, curiously distinguished into joints and fingers, and fit to be applied to any thing which reason can imagine or desire.

‘Meditations on the Six Days of Creation’ (1717) vi, p. 78

Contentment is a sleepy thing If it in death alone must die;

A quiet mind is worse than poverty, Unless it from enjoyment spring!

That’s blessedness alone that makes a King!

‘Of Contentment’

I within did flow

With seas of life, like wine.

I nothing in this world did know, But ’twas divine!

‘Wonder’ st. 3

8.63 Henry Duff Traill 1842-1900

Look in my face. My name is Used-to-was;

I am also called Played-out and Done-to-death, And It-will-wash-no-more.

‘After Dilettante Concetti’ (i.e. Dante Gabriel Rossetti) st. 8.

8.64 Joseph Trapp 1679-1747

The King, observing with judicious eyes

The state of both his universities,

To Oxford sent a troop of horse, and why? That learned body wanted loyalty;

To Cambridge books, as very well discerning How much that loyal body wanted learning.

Lines written on George I’s Donation of the Bishop of Ely’s Library to Cambridge University, in John Nichols ‘Literary Anecdotes’ (1812-6) vol. 3, p. 330.

8.65 Ben Travers 1886—

One night Mr and Mrs Reginald Bingham went to Ciro’s. They had been married only about six months. Mr Bingham had never been to Ciro’s before in his life. His surprise, therefore, upon seeing his wife there, was considerable.

‘Mischief’ (1926) ch. 1

8.66 Sir Herbert Beerbohm Tree 1852-1917

My poor fellow, why not carry a watch?

To a man in the street, carrying a grandfather clock, in Hesketh Pearson ‘Beerbohm Tree’ (1956) ch. 12

Sirs, I have tested your machine. It adds a new terror to life and makes death a long-felt want.

When pressed by a gramophone company for a written testimonial, in Hesketh Pearson ‘Beerbohm

Tree’ (1956) ch. 19; Beerbohm later insisted ‘the immortalism must stand’ when asked to make amendments

He is an old bore. Even the grave yawns for him.

In Max Beerbohm ‘Herbert Beerbohm Tree’ (1920) appendix 4 (referring to Israel Zangwill)

Ladies, just a little more virginity, if you don’t mind.

To a motley collection of women, assembled to play ladies in waiting to a queen, in Alexander Woollcott ‘Shouts and Murmurs’ (1923) ‘Capsule Criticism’

8.67 Herbert Trench 1865-1923

Come, let us make love deathless.

Title of poem

8.68 Richard Trench, Archbishop Of Dublin 1807-86

England, we love thee better than we know.

‘Gibraltar’

8.69 G. M. Trevelyan 1876-1962

Disinterested intellectual curiosity is the life-blood of real civilization.

‘English Social History’ (1942) introduction

It [education] has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading, an easy prey to sensations and cheap appeals.

‘English Social History’ (1942) ch. 18

8.70 Calvin Trillin

The shelf life of the modern hardback writer is somewhere between the milk and the yoghurt.

8.71 Lionel Trilling 1905-75

Immature artists imitate. Mature artists steal.

In ‘Esquire’ September 1962.

8.72 Tommy Trinder 1909-89

Overpaid, overfed, oversexed, and over here.

Referring to American troops in Britain during World War II and attributed to Trinder

8.73 Anthony Trollope 1815-82

He must have known me had he seen me as he was wont to see me, for he was in the habit of flogging me constantly. Perhaps he did not recognize me by my face.

‘Autobiography’ (1883) ch. 1

Take away from English authors their copyrights, and you would very soon take away from England her authors.

‘Autobiography’ (1883) ch. 6

Three hours a day will produce as much as a man ought to write.

‘Autobiography’ (1883) ch. 15

Of all the needs a book has the chief need is that it be readable.

‘Autobiography’ (1883) ch. 19.

I think that Plantagenet Palliser, Duke of Omnium, is a perfect gentleman. If he be not, then I am unable to describe a gentleman.

‘Autobiography’ (1883) ch. 20

She was rich in apparel, but not bedizened with finery...she well knew the great architectural secret of decorating her constructions, and never descended to construct a decoration.

Describing Mrs Stanhope in ‘Barchester Towers’ (1857) ch. 9

‘Unhand it, sir!’ said Mrs Proudie. From what scrap of dramatic poetry she had extracted the word cannot be said; but it must have rested on her memory, and now seemed opportunely dignified for the occasion.

‘Barchester Towers’ (1857) ch. 11

No man thinks there is much ado about nothing when the ado is about himself.

‘The Bertrams’ (1859) ch. 27

Those who have courage to love should have courage to suffer.

‘The Bertrams’ (1859) ch. 27

How I did respect you when you dared to speak the truth to me! Men don’t know women, or they would be harder to them.

‘The Claverings’ (1867) ch. 15

There is no road to wealth so easy and respectable as that of matrimony.

‘Doctor Thorne’ (1858) ch. 16

The comic almanacs give us dreadful pictures of January and February; but, in truth, the months which should be made to look gloomy in England are March and April. Let no man boast himself that he has got through the perils of winter till at least the seventh of May.

‘Doctor Thorne’ (1858) ch. 47

For the most of us, if we do not talk of ourselves, or at any rate of the individual circles of which we are the centres, we can talk of nothing. I cannot hold with those who wish to put down the insignificant chatter of the world.

‘Framley Parsonage’ (1860) ch. 10

She understood how much louder a cock can crow in its own farmyard than elsewhere.

‘The Last Chronicle of Barset’ (1867) ch. 17

It’s dogged as does it. It ain’t thinking about it.

‘The Last Chronicle of Barset’ (1867) ch. 61

With many women I doubt whether there be any more effectual way of touching their hearts than ill-using them and then confessing it. If you wish to get the sweetest fragrance from the herb at your feet, tread on it and bruise it.

‘Miss Mackenzie’ (1865) ch. 10

We cannot bring ourselves to believe it possible that a foreigner should in any respect be wiser than ourselves. If any such point out to us our follies, we at once claim those follies as the special evidences of our wisdom.

‘Orley Farm’ (1862) ch. 18

It is because we put up with bad things that hotel-keepers continue to give them to us.

‘Orley Farm’ (1862) ch. 18

As for conceit, what man will do any good who is not conceited? Nobody holds a good opinion of a man who has a low opinion of himself.

‘Orley Farm’ (1862) ch. 22

A fainèant government is not the worst government that England can have.

It has been the great fault of our politicians that they have all wanted to do something.

‘Phineas Finn’ (1869) ch. 13

Mr Turnbull had predicted evil consequences...and was now doing the best in his power to bring about the verification of his own prophecies.

‘Phineas Finn’ (1869) ch. 25

Perhaps there is no position more perilous to a man’s honesty than that...of knowing himself to be quite loved by a girl whom he almost loves himself.

‘Phineas Finn’ (1869) ch. 50

She knew how to allure by denying, and to make the gift rich by delaying it.

‘Phineas Finn’ (1869) ch. 57

Men are so seldom really good. They are so little sympathetic. What man thinks of changing himself so as to suit his wife? And yet men expect that women shall put on altogether new characters when they are married, and girls think that they can do so.

‘Phineas Redux’ (1874) ch. 3

It is the necessary nature of a political party in this country to avoid, as long as it can be avoided, the consideration of any question which involves a great change...The best carriage horses are those which can most steadily hold back against the coach as it trundles down the hill.

‘Phineas Redux’ (1874) ch. 4

To think of one’s absent love is very sweet; but it becomes monotonous after a mile or two of a towing-path, and the mind will turn away to Aunt Sally, the Cremorne Gardens, and financial questions. I doubt whether any girl would be satisfied with her lover’s mind if she knew the whole of it.

‘The Small House at Allington’ (1864) ch. 4

Why is it that girls so constantly do this,—so frequently ask men who have loved them to be present at their marriages with other men? There is no triumph in it. It is done in sheer kindness and affection. They intend to offer something which shall soften and not aggravate the sorrow that they have caused...I fully appreciate the intention, but in honest truth, I doubt the eligibility of the proffered entertainment.

‘The Small House at Allington’ (1864) ch. 9

It may almost be a question whether such wisdom as many of us have in our mature years has not come from the dying out of the power of temptation, rather than as the results of thought and resolution.

‘The Small House at Allington’ (1864) ch. 14

And, above all things, never think that you’re not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you very much at your own reckoning.

‘The Small House at Allington’ (1864) ch. 32

The tenth Muse, who now governs the periodical press.

‘The Warden’ (1855) ch. 14

Is it not singular how some men continue to obtain the reputation of popular authorship without adding a word to the literature of their country worthy of note?...To puff and to get one’s self puffed have become different branches of a new profession.

‘The Way We Live Now’ (1875) ch. 1

Love is like any other luxury. You have no right to it unless you can afford it.

‘The Way We Live Now’ (1875) ch. 84

8.74 Leon Trotsky (Lev Davidovich Bronstein) 1879-1940

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man.

‘Diary in Exile’ (1959) 8 May 1935

Civilization has made the peasantry its pack animal. The bourgeoisie in the long run only changed the form of the pack.

‘History of the Russian Revolution’ (1933) vol. 3, ch. 1

You [the Mensheviks] are pitiful isolated individuals; you are bankrupts; your role is played out. Go where you belong from now on—into the dustbin of history!

‘History of the Russian Revolution’ (1933) vol. 3, ch. 10

Where force is necessary, there it must be applied boldly, decisively and completely. But one must know the limitations of force; one must know when to blend force with a manoeuvre, a blow with an agreement.

‘What Next?’ (1932) ch. 14

8.75 Harry S. Truman 1884-1972

All the President is, is a glorified public relations man who spends his time flattering, kissing and kicking people to get them to do what they are supposed to do anyway.

Letter to his sister, 14 November 1947, in ‘Off the Record: the Private Papers of Harry S. Truman’ (1980) p. 119

The buck stops here.

Unattributed motto on Truman’s desk. ‘Public Papers 1952-53’ (1966) p. 1094

Wherever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship.

Lecture at Columbia University, 28 April 1959, in ‘Truman Speaks’ (1960) p. 51

I never give them [the public] hell. I just tell the truth, and they think it is hell.

In ‘Look’ 3 April 1956

A politician is a man who understands government, and it takes a politician to run a government. A statesman is a politician who’s been dead 10 or 15 years.

In ‘New York World Telegram and Sun’ 12 April 1958

It’s a recession when your neighbour loses his job; it’s a depression when you lose yours.

In ‘Observer’ 13 April 1958

I didn’t fire him [General MacArthur] because he was a dumb son of a bitch, although he was, but that’s not against the law for generals. If it was, half to three-quarters of them would be in jail.

In Merle Miller ‘Plain Speaking’ (1974) ch. 24

8.76 Barbara W. Tuchman 1912-89

Dead battles, like dead generals, hold the military mind in their dead grip and Germans, no less than other peoples, prepare for the last war.

‘August 1914’ (1962) ch. 2

No more distressing moment can ever face a British government than that which requires it to come to a hard, fast and specific decision.

‘August 1914’ (1962) ch. 9

For one August in its history Paris was French—and silent.

‘August 1914’ (1962) ch. 20

8.77 Sophie Tucker 1884-1966

From birth to 18 a girl needs good parents. From 18 to 35, she needs good looks. From 35 to 55, good personality. From 55 on, she needs good cash. I’m saving my money.

In Michael Freedland ‘Sophie’ (1978) p. 214

8.78 Martin Tupper 1810-89