Добавил:
ivanov666
Опубликованный материал нарушает ваши авторские права? Сообщите нам.
Вуз:
Предмет:
Файл:Sons and Lovers
.pdf
SONS AND LOVERS
“There isn’t room in THIS house for two such bobby –
dazzlers, if you fly your kites THAT high!” she rallied them.
It was a nasty thrust.
He in his dinner jacket, and Clara in her green dress and
bare arms, were confused. They felt they must shelter each
other in that little kitchen.
“And look at THAT blossom! “continued Mrs. Radford,
pointing to Clara. “What does she reckon she did it for? “
Paul looked at Clara. She was rosy; her neck was warm
with blushes. There was a moment of silence.
“You like to see it, don’t you?” he asked.
The mother had them in her power. All the time his
heart was beating hard, and he was tight with anxiety. But he
would fight her.
“Me like to see it! “ exclaimed the old woman. “What
should I like to see her make a fool of herself for? “
‘Tve seen people look bigger fools, “ he said. Clara was
under his protection now.
“Oh, ay! and when was that? “ came the sarcastic rejoinder.
“When they made frights of themselves, “ he answered.
Mrs. Radford, large and threatening, stood suspended on the hearthrug, holding her fork.
“They’re fools either road, “ she answered at length, turning to the Dutch oven.
“No, “ he said, fighting stoutly. “Folk ought to look as
well as they can.”
“And do you call THAT looking nice!” cried the mother,
pointing a scornful fork at Clara. “That – that looks as if it
wasn’t properly dressed!”
471
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
“I believe you’re jealous that you can’t swank as well, “
he said laughing.
“Me! I could have worn evening dress with anybody, if
I’d wanted to! “ came the scornful answer.
“And why didn’t you want to?” he asked pertinently. “Or
DID you wear it?”
There was a long pause. Mrs. Radford readjusted the
bacon in the Dutch oven. His heart beat fast, for fear he had
offended her.
“Me! “ she exclaimed at last. “No, I didn’t! And when I
was in service, I knew as soon as one of the maids came
out in bare shoulders what sort SHE was, going to her sixpenny hop! “
“Were you too good to go to a sixpenny hop?” he said.
Clara sat with bowed head. His eyes were dark and glittering. Mrs. Radford took the Dutch oven from the fire, and
stood near him, putting bits of bacon on his plate.
“THERE’S a nice crozzly bit! “she said. “Don’t give me the
best! “ he said.
“SHE’S got what SHE wants,” was the answer.
There was a sort of scornful forbearance in the woman’s
tone that made Paul know she was mollified.
“But DO have some! “ he said to Clara.
She looked up at him with her grey eyes, humiliated and
lonely. “No thanks! “ she said.
“Why won’t you?” he answered carelessly.
The blood was beating up like fire in his veins. Mrs.
Radford sat down again, large and impressive and aloof. He
left Clara altogether to attend to the mother.
“They say Sarah Bernhardt’s fifty, “ he said.
472
SONS AND LOVERS
“Fifty! She’s turned sixty! “ came the scornful answer.
“Well, “ he said, “you’d never think it! She made me want
to howl even now.”
“I should like to see myself howling at THAT bad old
baggage! “ said Mrs. Radford. “It’s time she began to think
herself a grandmother, not a shrieking catamaran – ”
He laughed.
“A catamaran is a boat the Malays use, “ he said. “And it’s
a word as I use, “ she retorted.
“My mother does sometimes, and it’s no good my telling
her, “ he said.
“I s’d think she boxes your ears, “ said Mrs. Radford, good
humouredly.
“She’d like to, and she says she will, so I give her a little
stool to stand on.”
“That’s the worst of my mother, “ said Clara. “She never
wants a stool for anything. “
“But she often can’t touch THAT lady with a long prop,
“ retorted Mrs. Radford to Paul.
“I s’d think she doesn’t want touching with a prop, “ he
laughed. “I shouldn’t. “
“It might do the pair of you good to give you a crack on
the head with one, “ said the mother, laughing suddenly.
“Why are you so vindictive towards me?” he said. “I’ve not
stolen anything from you. “
“No; I’ll watch that,” laughed the older woman.
Soon the supper was finished. Mrs. Radford sat guard in
her chair. Paul lit a cigarette. Clara went upstairs, returning
with a sleeping suit, which she spread on the fender to air.
473
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
“Why, I’d forgot all about THEM! “ said Mrs. Radford.
“Where have they sprung from?”
“Out of my drawer.”
“H’m! You bought ‘em for Baxter, an’ he wouldn’t wear
‘em, would he? “ – laughing. “Said he reckoned to do wi’out
trousers i’ bed. “ She turned confidentially to Paul, saying:
“He couldn’t BEAR ‘em, them pyjama things. “
The young man sat making rings of smoke. “Well, it’s everyone to his taste,” he laughed.
Then followed a little discussion of the merits of pyjamas.
“My mother loves me in them,” he said. “She says I’m a
pierrot.” “I can imagine they’d suit you, “ said Mrs. Radford.
After a while he glanced at the little clock that was
ticking on the mantelpiece. It was half – past twelve.
“It is funny,” he said, “but it takes hours to settle down to
sleep after the theatre.”
“It’s about time you did, “ said Mrs. Radford, clearing the
table. “Are YOU tired? “ he asked of Clara.
“Not the least bit,” she answered, avoiding his eyes. “Shall
we have a game at cribbage?” he said.
“I’ve forgotten it.”
“Well, I’ll teach you again. May we play crib, Mrs. Radford? “ he asked.
“You’ll please yourselves, “ she said; “but it’s pretty late. “ “A
game or so will make us sleepy, “ he answered.
Clara brought the cards, and sat spinning her wedding – ring whilst he shuffled them. Mrs. Radford was washing up in the scullery. As it grew later Paul felt the situation
getting more and more tense.
“Fifteen two, fifteen four, fifteen six, and two’s eight – !”
474
SONS AND LOVERS
The clock struck one. Still the game continued. Mrs. Radford had done all the little jobs preparatory to going to bed,
had locked the door and filled the kettle. Still Paul went on
dealing and counting. He was obsessed by Clara’s arms and
throat. He believed he could see where the division was just
beginning for her breasts. He could not leave her. She watched
his hands, and felt her joints melt as they moved quickly. She
was so near; it was almost as if he touched her, and yet not
quite. His mettle was roused. He hated Mrs. Radford. She
sat on, nearly dropping asleep, but determined and obstinate
in her chair. Paul glanced at her, then at Clara. She met his
eyes, that were angry, mocking, and hard as steel. Her own
answered him in shame. He knew SHE, at any rate, was of his
mind. He played on.
At last Mrs. Radford roused herself stiffly, and said: “Isn’t
it nigh on time you two was thinking o’ bed? “
Paul played on without answering. He hated her sufficiently to murder her.
“Half a minute, “ he said.
The elder woman rose and sailed stubbornly into the
scullery, returning with his candle, which she put on the
mantelpiece. Then she sat down again. The hatred of her
went so hot down his veins, he dropped his cards.
“We’ll stop, then,” he said, but his voice was still a challenge.
Clara saw his mouth shut hard. Again he glanced at
her. It seemed like an agreement. She bent over the cards,
coughing, to clear her throat.
“Well, I’m glad you’ve finished, “ said Mrs. Radford.
“Here, take your things” – she thrust the warm suit in his
475
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
hand – ”and this is your candle. Your room’s over this; there’s
only two, so you can’t go far wrong. Well, good – night. I hope
you’ll rest well.”
‘’I’m sure I shall; I always do, “ he said.
“Yes; and so you ought at your age,” she replied.
He bade good – night to Clara, and went. The twisting
stairs of white, scrubbed wood creaked and clanged at every
step. He went doggedly. The two doors faced each other.
He went in his room, pushed the door to, without fastening
the latch.
It was a small room with a large bed. Some of Clara’s hair –
pins were on the dressing – table – her hair – brush. Her
clothes and some skirts hung under a cloth in a corner. There
was actually a pair of stockings over a chair. He explored the
room. Two books of his own were there on the shelf. He undressed, folded his suit, and sat on the bed, listening. Then he
blew out the candle, lay down, and in two minutes was almost
asleep. Then click! – he was wide awake and writhing in torment. It was as if, when he had nearly got to sleep, something
had bitten him suddenly and sent him mad. He sat up and
looked at the room in the darkness, his feet doubled under
him, perfectly motionless, listening. He heard a cat somewhere
away outside; then the heavy, poised tread of the mother; then
Clara’s distinct voice:
“Will you unfasten my dress? “
There was silence for some time. At last the mother said:
“Now then! aren’t you coming up?”
“No, not yet,” replied the daughter calmly.
“Oh, very well then! If it’s not late enough, stop a bit
longer. Only you needn’t come waking me up when I’ve got
to sleep.”
476
SONS AND LOVERS
“I shan’t be long,” said Clara.
Immediately afterwards Paul heard the mother slowly
mounting the stairs. The candlelight flashed through the
cracks in his door. Her dress brushed the door, and his heart
jumped. Then it was dark, and he heard the clatter of her
latch. She was very leisurely indeed in her preparations for
sleep. After a long time it was quite still. He sat strung up
on the bed, shivering slightly. His door was an inch open.
As Clara came upstairs, he would intercept her. He waited.
All was dead silence. The clock struck two. Then he heard
a slight scrape of the fender downstairs. Now he could not
help himself. His shivering was uncontrollable. He felt he
must go or die.
He stepped off the bed, and stood a moment, shuddering. Then he went straight to the door. He tried to step
lightly. The first stair cracked like a shot. He listened. The
old woman stirred in her bed. The staircase was dark. There
was a slit of light under the stair – foot door, which opened
into the kitchen. He stood a moment. Then he went on, mechanically. Every step creaked, and his back was creeping,
lest the old woman’s door should open behind him up above.
He fumbled with the door at the bottom. The latch opened
with a loud clack. He went through into the kitchen, and
shut the door noisily behind him. The old woman daren’t
come now.
Then he stood, arrested. Clara was kneeling on a pile
of white underclothing on the hearthrug, her back towards
him, warming herself. She did not look round, but sat crouching on her heels, and her rounded beautiful back was towards him, and her face was hidden. She was warming her
477
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
body at the fire for consolation. The glow was rosy on one
side, the shadow was dark and warm on the other. Her arms
hung slack.
He shuddered violently, clenching his teeth and fists
hard to keep control. Then he went forward to her. He put
one hand on her shoulder, the fingers of the other hand
under her chin to raise her face. A convulsed shiver ran
through her, once, twice, at his touch. She kept her head
bent.
“Sorry! “ he murmured, realising that his hands were very
cold.
Then she looked up at him, frightened, like a thing that
is afraid of death.
“My hands are so cold, “ he murmured.
“I like it, “ she whispered, closing her eyes.
The breath of her words were on his mouth. Her arms
clasped his knees. The cord of his sleeping – suit dangled
against her and made her shiver. As the warmth went into
him, his shuddering became less.
At length, unable to stand so any more, he raised her, and
she buried her head on his shoulder. His hands went over
her slowly with an infinite tenderness of caress. She clung
close to him, trying to hide herself against him. He clasped
her very fast. Then at last she looked at him, mute, imploring,
looking to see if she must be ashamed.
His eyes were dark, very deep, and very quiet. It was as if
her beauty and his taking it hurt him, made him sorrowful. He looked at her with a little pain, and was afraid. He
was so humble before her. She kissed him fervently on the
eyes, first one, then the other, and she folded herself to him.
478
SONS AND LOVERS
She gave herself. He held her fast. It was a moment intense
almost to agony.
She stood letting him adore her and tremble with joy of
her. It healed her hurt pride. It healed her; it made her glad.
It made her feel erect and proud again. Her pride had been
wounded inside her. She had been cheapened. Now she radiated with joy and pride again. It was her restoration and
her recognition.
Then he looked at her, his face radiant. They laughed
to each other, and he strained her to his chest. The seconds
ticked off, the minutes passed, and still the two stood clasped
rigid together, mouth to mouth, like a statue in one block.
But again his fingers went seeking over her, restless,
wandering, dissatisfied. The hot blood came up wave upon
wave. She laid her head on his shoulder.
“Come you to my room, “ he murmured.
She looked at him and shook her head, her mouth pouting disconsolately, her eyes heavy with passion. He watched
her fixedly.
“Yes! “ he said.
Again she shook her head.
“Why not? “ he asked.
She looked at him still heavily, sorrowfully, and again she
shook her head. His eyes hardened, and he gave way.
When, later on, he was back in bed, he wondered why
she had refused to come to him openly, so that her mother
would know. At any rate, then things would have been definite. And she could have stayed with him the night, without
having to go, as she was, to her mother’s bed. It was strange,
479
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
and he could not understand it. And then almost immediately he fell asleep.
He awoke in the morning with someone speaking to
him. Opening his eyes, he saw Mrs. Radford, big and stately,
looking down on him. She held a cup of tea in her hand.
“Do you think you’re going to sleep till Doomsday?” she
said. He laughed at once.
“It ought only to be about five o’clock, he said.
“Well, “ she answered, “it’s half – past seven, whether or
not. Here, I’ve brought you a cup of tea. “
He rubbed his face, pushed the tumbled hair off his
forehead, and roused himself.
“What’s it so late for! he grumbled.
He resented being wakened. It amused her. She saw his
neck in the flannel sleeping – jacket, as white and round as
a girl’s. He rubbed his hair crossly.
“It’s no good your scratching your head, she said. “It won’t
make it no earlier. Here, an’ how long d’you think I’m going to
stand waiting wi’ this here cup?”
“Oh, dash the cup! he said.
“You should go to bed earlier, “ said the woman. He looked
up at her, laughing with impudence.
“I went to bed before YOU did, he said. “Yes, my Guyney, you
did! she exclaimed.
“Fancy, “ he said, stirring his tea, “having tea brought to bed
to me!
My mother’ll think I’m ruined for life. “Don’t she never do
it? asked Mrs. Radford. “She’d as leave think of flying.
“Ah, I always spoilt my lot! That’s why they’ve turned out such
bad uns, said the elderly woman.
480
Соседние файлы в предмете [НЕСОРТИРОВАННОЕ]