The Political History of the Devil

THE POLITICAL HISTORY OF THE DEVIL

only by little Noises and sham Appearances, putting out the Candles, rushing and josteling in the Dark, and the like! If the Devil was that mighty Seraph, which we have heard of, if he is a God of this World, a Prince of the Air, a Spirit able to destroy Cities and make Havock in the World; if he can raise Tempests and Storms, throw Fire about the World, and do wonderful Things, as an unchain’d Devil no Doubt could do; what need all this Frippery? and what need he try so many ridiculous Ways, by the Emptiness, nay, the silly nonsensical Manner, of which, he shews, that he is able to do no better, and that his Power is extinguish’d? In a Word, he would certainly act otherwise, if he could. Sed caret pedibus, he wants Power.

How weak a thing is it then, for any Man to expect Performance from the Devil? If he has not Power to do Mischief, which is his Element, his very Nature, and on many Accounts, is the very sum of his Desires; How should he have Power to do Good? how Power to deliver from Danger or from Death? which Deliverance would be in itself a Good, and we know it is not in his Nature to do Good to or for any Man?

In a Word, the Devil is strangely impudent, to think that any Man should depend upon him for the Performance of an Agreement of any Kind whatever, when he knows himself, that he is not able, if he was honest enough, to be as good as his Word.

Come we next to his expecting our Performance to him; tho’ he is not so just to us, yet, it seems, he never fails to come and demand Payment of us at the very Day appointed: He was but a weak Trader in Things of this Nature, who having sold his Soul to the Devil, so our old Women’s Tales call the Thing,

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and when the Devil came to demand his Bargain, put it off as a Thing of no Force, for that it was done so long ago, he thought he (the Devil) had forgot it. It was a better Answer, which they tell us, a Lutheran Divine gave the Devil in the Name of a poor Wretch, who had sold himself to the Devil, and who was in a terrible Fright about his coming for his Bargain, as he might well be indeed, if the Devil has such a Power, as really to come and take it by Force. The Story (if you can bear a serious one) is this.

The Man was in great Horror of Mind, and the Family fear’d he would destroy himself; at length they sent for a Lutheran Minister to talk with him, and who after some Labour with him, got out the Truth (viz.) that he had sold himself to the Devil, and that the Time was almost expir’d, when he expected the Devil would come and fetch him away, and he was sure he would not fail coming to the Time to a Minute; the Minister first endeavour’d to convince him of the horrid Crime, and to bring him to a true Penitence for that Part; and having as he thought made him a sincere Penitent, he then began to encourage him, and particularly, desir’d of him, that when the Time was come, that the Devil should fetch him away, he, the Minister, should be in the House with him; accordingly, to make the Story short, the Time came, the Devil came, and the Minister was present, when the Devil came; what Shape he was in, the Story does not say; the Man said he saw him, and cry’d out; the Minister could not see him, but the Man affirming he was in the Room, the Minister said aloud, in the Name of the living God, Satan, what comest thou here for? The Devil answer’d, I come for my own; the Minister

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answer’d, He is not thy own, for Jesus Christ has redeem’d him, and in his Name I charge thee to avoid and touch him not; at which, says the Story, the Devil gave a furious Stamp (with his Cloven-Foot I suppose) and went away, and was never known to molest him afterward.

Another Story, tho’ it be in it self a long one, I shall abridge (for your reading with the less Uneasiness) as follows.

A young Gentleman of – – berg, in the Elector of Brandenburgh’s (now the King of Prussia’s) Dominions, being deeply in Love with a beautiful Lady, but something above his Fortune, and whom he could by no Means bring to love him again, apply’d himself to an old thing call’d a Witch, for her Assistance, and promised her great Things, if she could bring the Lady to love him, or any how compass her, so as he might have his Will of her; nay, at last he told her he would give up his Soul to her, if she would answer his Desire.

The old Hag, it seems, having had some of his Money, had very honestly tried what she could do, but all to no Purpose, the Lady would not comply; but when he offer’d such a great Price, she told him, she would consider farther against such a Time, and so appointed him the next Evening.

At the Time appointed he comes, and the Witch made a long Speech to him upon the Nicety of the Affair; I suppose to prepare him not to be surpriz’d at what was to come; for she suppos’d he was not so very desperately bent as he appear’d to be; she told him it was a Thing of very great Difficulty; but as he had made such a great Offer, of selling his Soul for it, she had an Acquaintance in the House, who was better skill’d (than she was) in such particular Things, and would treat with

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him farther, and she doubted not but that both together they might answer his End. The Fellow it seems was still of the same Mind, and told her, he car’d not what he pawn’d or sold, if he could but obtain the Lady; well, says the old Hag, sit still a while, and with that she withdraws.

By and by she comes in again with a Question in her Mouth; pray, says she, do you seek this Lady for a Wife, or for a Mistress, would you marry her, or would you only lie with her? The young Man told her no, no, he did not expect she would lie with him, therefore he would be satisfied to marry her, but asks her the Reason of the Question; why truly, says the old Hag, my Reason is very Weighty; for if you would have her for your Wife, I doubt, we can do you no Service; but if you have a Mind to lie with her, the Person, I speak of, will undertake it.

The Man was surpriz’d at that, only he objected that this was a transient or short Felicity, and that he should perhaps have her no more; the old Hag bid him not fear, but that if she once yielded to be his Whore, he might have her as often as he pleased; upon this he consents, for he was stark mad for the Lady; He having consented, she told him then, he should follow her, but told him, whoever he saw, he must speak to no body but her, till she gave him leave, and that he should not be surpriz’d, whatever happen’d, for no hurt should befall him; all which he agreed to, and the old Woman going out he follow’d her.

Being upon this led into another Room, where there was but very little Light, yet enough to let him see that there was no body in it but himself and the Woman, he was desired to sit down in a Chair next to a Table, and the old Woman clapping

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the Door too after her, he asked her why she shut the Door, and where was the Person she told him of? At which she answer’d there he is, pointing to a Chair at a little Distance: The young Gentleman turning his Head, saw a grave Kind of a Man sitting in an Elbow-Chair, tho’ he said, he could have sworn there was no body in the Chair when the old Woman shut the Door; however, having promis’d not to speak to any body but the old Woman, he said not a Word.

By and by the Woman making abundance of strange Gestures and Motions, and mumbling over several Things which he could not understand, on a suddain a large Wick- er-Chair, which stood by the Chimney, removes to the other End of the Table which he sat by, but there was no body in the Chair; in about two Minutes after that the Chair remov’d, there appear’d a Person sitting in that too, who, the Room being, as is said, almost dark, could not be so distinguish’d by the Eye, as to see his Countenance.

After some while, the first Man, and the Chair he sat in, mov’d, as if they had been one Body, to the Table also; and the old Woman and the two Men seem’d to talk together, but the young Man could not understand any Thing they said; after some Time the old Witch turn’d to the young Gentleman, told him his Request was granted, but not for Marriage, but the Lady should love and receive him.

The Witch then gave him a Stick dipt in Tar at both Ends, and bid him hold it to a Candle, which he did, and instead of burning like a Stick it burnt out like a Torch; then she bid him break it off in the Middle, and light the other End; he did that too, and all the Room seem’d to be in a light Flame;

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then she said, deliver one Piece here, pointing to one only of the Persons, so he gave the first Fire-stick to the first Man or Apparition; now says she, deliver the other here, so he gave the other Piece to the other Apparition, at which they both rose up and spoke to him Words, which he said he understood not, and could not repeat, and immediately vanish’d with the Fire-sticks and all, leaving the Room full of Smoke: I do not remember that the Story says any Thing of Brimstone, or the Smell of it, but it says the Door continu’d fast lock’d, and no Body was left in the Room but the young Gentleman and the Witch.

Now the Ceremony being over, he ask’d the Witch if the Business was done? She said yes. Well, but says he, have I sold my Soul to the Devil? Yes, says she, you have, and you gave him Possession, when you deliver’d the two Fire-sticks to him. To him! says he, why, was that the Devil? Yes, says the old Hag. At which the young Man was in a terrible Fright for a while, but it went off again.

And what’s next, says he, when shall I see the Lady for whose sake I have done all this? You shall know that presently, said she, and opening the Door, in the next Room she presents him with a most beautiful Lady, but had charg’d him not to speak a Word to her: She was exactly dress’d like, and he presently knew her to be the Lady he desir’d; upon which he flew to her and clasped her in his Arms, but that Moment he had her fast, as he thought, in his Arms, she vanish’d out of his sight.

Finding himself thus disappointed, he upbraids the old Woman with betraying him, and flew out with ill Language at

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her, in a great Rage; the Devil often deluded him thus, after this, with Shews and Appearances, but still no Performance; after a while he gets an Opportunity to speak with the Lady her self in Reality, but she was as positive in her Denial as ever, and even took away all Hopes of his ever obtaining her, which put him into Despair; for now he thought he had given himself up to the Devil for nothing, and this brought him to himself; so that he made a penitent Confession of his Crime to some Friends, who took great Care of him, and encourag’d him, and at last furnish’d him with such an Answer as put the Devil into a Fright, when he came for the Bargain.

For Satan, it seems, as the Story says, had the Impudence to demand his Agreement, notwithstanding he had fail’d in the Performance on his Part; what the Answer was I do not pretend to have seen, but it seems it was something like what is mention’d above, (viz.) that he was in better Hands, and that he durst not touch him.

I have heard of another Person that had actually sign’d a Contract with the Devil; and upon a Fast kept by some Protestant or Christian Divines, while they were praying for the poor Man, the Devil was oblig’d to come and throw the Contract in at the Window.

But I vouch none of these Stories, there may be much in them and much Use made of them, even whether exactly such in Fact, as they are related, or no; the best Use I can make of them, is this, if any wicked desperate Wretches have made Bargain and Sale with Satan, their only Way is to repent, if they know how, and that before he comes to claim them; then batter him with his own Guns; play Religion against

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Devilism, and perhaps they may drive the Devil out of their Reach; at least he will not come at them, which is as well.

On the other Hand, how many Stories have we handed about of the Devil’s really coming with a terrible Appearance at the Time appointed, and powerfully or by violence carrying away those, that have given themselves thus up to him; nay, and sometimes a Piece of the House along with them, as in the famous Instance of Sudbury, Anno 1662. It seems he comes with Rage and Fury upon such Occasions, pretending he only comes to take his own, or as if he had leave given him to come and take his Goods, as we say, where he could find them, and would strike a Terror into all that should oppose him.

The greatest Part of the Terror we are usually in upon this Occasion, is from a Supposition, that when this HellFire Contract is once made, God allows the Devil to come and take the wicked Creature, how and in what manner he thinks fit, as being given up to him by his own Act and Deed; but in my Opinion there’s no Divinity at all in that; for as in our Law we punish a Felo de se, or Self-murtherer, because, as the Law suggests, he had no Right to dismiss his own Life; that he being a Subject of the Common-wealth, the Government claims the Ward or Custody of him, and so ‘twas not Murther only, but Robbery, and is a Felony against the State, robbing the King of his Liege-Man, as ‘tis justly call’d; so neither has any Man a Right to dispose of his Soul, which belongs to his Maker in Property and in Right of Creation: The Man then having no Right to sell, Satan has no Right to buy, or at best he has made a Purchase without a Title, and consequently has no just Claim to the Possession.

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It is therefore a Mistake to say, that when any of us have been so mad to make such a pretended Contract with the Devil, that God gives him leave to take it as his Due; ‘tis no such thing; the Devil has bought, what you had no Right to sell, and therefore, as an unlawful Oath is to be repented of, and then broken; so your Business is to repent of the Crime, and then tell the Devil, you have better consider’d of it, and that you won’t stand to your Bargain, for you had no Power to sell; and if he pretends to Violence after that, I am mistaken; I believe the Devil knows better.

It is true, our old Mothers and Nurses have told us other Things, but they only told us what their Mothers and Nurses told them, and so the Tale has been handed down from one Generation of old Women to another; but we have no Vouchers for the Fact other than Oral Tradition, the Credit of which, I confess, goes but a very little Way with me; nor do I believe it one Jot the more for all the frightful Addenda which they generally join to the Tale, for it never wants a great Variety of that Kind.

Thus they tell us the Devil carried away Dr. Faustus and took a Piece of the Wall of his Garden along with them: Thus at Salisbury the Devil as it is said, and publickly printed, carried away two Fellows that had given themselves up to him, and carried away the Roof of the House with them, and the like; all which I believe my Share of; besides, if these Stories were really true, they are all against the Devil’s true Interest, Satan must be a Fool, which is indeed what I never took him to be in the Main; this would be the Way not to encrease the Number of Desperadoes, who should thus put themselves into

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his Hand, but to make himself a Terror to them; and this is one of the most powerful Objections I have against the Thing, for the Devil, I say, is no Fool, that must be acknowledg’d; he knows his own Game, and generally plays it sure.

I might, before I quit this Point, seriously reflect here upon our Beau mond (viz.) the gay Part of Mankind, especially those of the Times we live in, who walk about in a Composure and Tranquillity inexpressible, and yet as we all know, must certainly have all sold themselves to the Devil, for the Power of acting the foolishest Things with the greater Applause; it is true, to be a Fool is the most pleasant Life in the World, if the Fool has but the particular Felicity, which few Fools want, (viz.) to think themselves wise: The learned say, it is the Dignity and Perfection of Fools, that they never fail trusting themselves; they believe themselves sufficient and able for every Thing; and hence their want or waste of Brains is no Grievance to them, but they hug themselves in the Satiety of their own Wit; but to bring other People to have the same Notion of them, which they have of themselves, and to have their apish and ridiculous Conduct make the same Impression on the Minds of others, as it does on their own; this requires a general Infatuation, and must either be a Judgment from Heaven, or a Mist of Hell; nothing but the Devil can make all the Men of Brains applaud a Fool, and can any Man believe, that the Devil will do this for nothing? no, no, he will be well paid for it, and I know no other Way they have to compound with him, but this of Bargain and Sale.

‘Tis the same thing with Rakes and Bullies, as ‘tis with Fools and Beaus; and this brings me to the Subject of buying

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