Unit. Marriage. Family Matters

E x.1. Lead-in: Read the following saying and discusses them in pairs. Which one do you like most of all and why?

• A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. (Mignon McLaughlin)

• Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember

• Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. Albert Einstein quotes

& Ex. 2a)* Read the text.

Marriage and wedding

It all starts with a proposal. Traditionally the man goes down on one knee to pop the question. If he receives a "yes", the couple are engaged. It is customary for the man to buy his fiancée an engagement ring. Engagements can last for years, and if neither of the couple breaks off the engagement, the next step is marriage.

Planning the wedding

Most weddings in the UK take the form of either a civil ceremony (conducted at the Registry Office) or a traditional white wedding, held in a church. (There are other ceremonies for different religions.) If the couple chooses a church service, the planning can become quite complex. The church must be booked, the service has to be chosen, flowers arranged and so on. Other arrangements (for both traditional and civil) are to draw up a guest list, send out invitations, book a reception venue (for after the ceremony), choose bridesmaids (the girls who traditionally accompany the bride in the church) and the best man (the bridegroom's friend who accompanies him to the ceremony), buy the wedding dress, arrange a honeymoon (the holiday after the wedding), compile a wedding list (a list of presents that guests can choose to buy the couple) and of course, to select the wedding ring(s).

The big day

The groom and best man arrive at the church first, and then the guests arrive. Last to arrive is the bride, normally dressed in a long white wedding dress with a train (material from the dress that covers the floor behind her), her face covered in a veil, carrying a bouquet of flowers, and accompanied by a couple of bridesmaids in matching dresses. Usually the bride's father walks her down the aisle until they reach the priest / vicar at the altar. The church organ plays the Wedding March, and the guests rise to their feet to watch the procession. Once they reach the altar, the bride stands with the groom, and the service begins. The service lasts for about half an hour, and contains readings (extracts from the Bible) and a couple of hymns (religious songs). The priest always asks if there are any objections to the marriage (someone can speak or forever hold their peace = never have the opportunity again to object), and at the end of the service, the couple exchange rings and are proclaimed "man and wife". At that point, the groom is allowed to kiss his wife. The guests leave and the couple then sign the marriage register. When they come out of the church, the guests often throw confetti (small pieces of coloured paper), and the photographer takes various formal photographs.

Next in the big day is the reception, which is often a formal lunch in a hotel. After lunch there are various speeches. The bride's father normally gives a speech, then the best man gives a speech (which is often a funny speech designed to embarrass the groom), and the bridegroom and / or the bride give a short speech to thank their guests.

Some couples also arrange an evening reception, and hire a disco or band to play music for their friends.

At the end of the day, the happy couple traditionally leaves on honeymoon.

Ex. 2b) Answer the questions.

1. How is usually weeding planned?

1. Describe a typical wedding day.

2. Do you think wedding might be quite stressful?

3. Have you heard about some uncommon of proposal?

4. Would you like to be a bridesmaid/ best man?

& Ex. 3a) 10 Wedding Traditions from Around the World.

Wardrobe Change

In modern China, brides pick not one wedding dress, but three. First, there's the traditional qipao or cheongsam, an embroidered, slim-fitting frock that's usually made red for weddings, because red is a strong, lucky color in Chinese culture. Next, the bride might swap into a white poufed ball gown that wouldn't look out of place at an American wedding — a bridal nod to the popularity of Western trends. Finally, the bride ducks out of the reception to change into a third dress, this one a gown of her color choice or a cocktail dress.

Painted Hands

Before an Indian bride gets married, she and her female friends and family decorate their hands and feet with elaborate designs called menhdi. These temporary designs are made from the plant dye henna, and they last just a few weeks. The menhdi designs are incredibly intricate and take hours to apply, not including the time the bride must wait for the henna paste to dry and stain her skin. Turning the occasion into a "mehndi party" makes the process more fun — and provides some friends and family to help the bride out if she needs anything while she's being adorned.

Jumping the Broom

A number of cultures, from Celts to Roma (or Gypsies) have incorporated some sort of leap over a broom into their wedding traditions. Today, broom-jumping is most often found in African-American weddings, the tradition rooted in the days of slavery when marriage between enslaved men and women wasn't legally sanctioned. In the antebellum period, enslaved men and women would declare their union by jumping over a broom together.

Mazel Tov!

The breaking of the glass in Jewish weddings, in which the groom crushes a glass under his foot at the end of the ceremony, is a tradition with murky roots. Some hold that the breaking glass symbolizes the destruction of the great Temple in Jerusalem in A.D. 70, while others say that the broken glass is a reminder that joy should always be tempered. Either way, breaking the glass is usually undertaken in the spirit of happiness today, with wedding guests calling out "mazel tov!" (good luck!) after the glass shatters.

Baby Bridesmaids

Royal weddings in the United Kingdom do bridesmaids with a twist. Usually, the bride's attendants are young girls rather than the contemporaries. At Queen Elizabeth II's wedding in 1947, there were eight bridesmaids, most younger than the 21-year-old bride. Diana had five bridesmaids, the youngest of whom was 5. The oldest was 17. Royal bride Kate Middleton took it even younger in her 2011 wedding, inviting her husband-to-be's goddaughter and Camilla Parker Bowles' granddaughter, both 3, down the aisle.

Peruvian Cake Pull

In Peru, single female guests take part in a tradition a little sweeter than a bouquet toss. Charms attached to ribbons are tucked between the layers of the wedding cake. Before the cake is cut, each woman grabs a ribbon and pulls. At the end of one ribbon is a fake wedding ring. The guest who picks that ribbon is said to be next in line for marriage.

Slaughtering a Cow

Traditional Zulu weddings are marked by vibrant colors and dance-offs between the bride and groom's families. Like many brides across the world, Zulu brides might start the day in a Western "white wedding" dress, but change into traditional tribal clothing after a church wedding. In a traditional ceremony, the groom's family slaughters a cow to welcome the bride. The bride places money inside the stomach of the cow to symbolize that she is now part of the family.

Joyous Processional

Lebanese-style weddings kick off with music, dancing and joyful shouting right outside the groom's doors. This is the "zaffe," a rowdy, traditional escort made up of friends, family, and sometimes professional musicians and dancers. This group escorts the groom to his bride's house, and then sends them off in a shower of shouted blessings and flower petals.

Ransom for the Bride

Russian grooms have to work for their brides. Before the wedding, the groom shows up at the bride's home and asks for his beloved. In jest, her friends and family refuse him until he pays up in gifts, money, jewelry or simple humiliation. Grooms are forced to do silly dances, answer riddles, and perform goofy tests of worthiness like diapering a baby doll. Once the groom impresses friends and family with this bridal ransom, or "vykup nevesty," he's allowed to meet his bride-to-be.

Ransom for the Shoes

While Russian grooms are ransoming their brides, Pakistani men have to pay up if they want to keep their shoes. After a Pakistani wedding, the couple returns home for a ceremony called the "showing of the face." Family and friends hold a green shawl over the couple's heads and a mirror as the bride removes the veil she wears throughout the wedding ceremony. While the newlyweds are busy gazing at one another, the bride's female relatives make off with the groom's shoes and demand money for their safe return.

Ex. 3b) Give the English equivalent to the following words:

1. в шутку

2. важное событие-

3. печальный

4. новобрачный

5. подделка

6. лепесток

7. дурацкий

8. сложный,

9. выкуп невесты-

10. вуаль

11. новобрачные

12. шумный

13. ускользнуть

14. невеста

Ex. 3c) Discussion.

1. Which other traditions have you heard about?

2. Which are the weirdest?

3. Which you would like to ‘test’ at some wedding?

4. What is a wedding ceremony like in your country?

& Ex. 4a) Read the text about different types of marriages and try to find the name of the marriage by its description.

1. love marriages

2. a marriage of convenience

3. a sham marriage or fake marriage

4. forced marriage

5. arranged marriage

6. a Hollywood marriage

7. a ‘mixed’ marriage

8. a shotgun wedding

1. Marriage between people belonging to different religions, tribes, races, nationalities or ethnic backgrounds. This term has fallen into disuse, as it can sound offensive.

2. Once very common and still practiced in some cultures, an ______ marriage is one where the spouses are chosen by someone other than the couple getting married, and is entered into for practical reasons, not love. Those involved in arranging marriages for others include parents, professional matchmakers, friends, religious leaders, or some other third party.

3. Loving someone is a great thing and most of us know the excitement of meeting their prospective partner and falling in love. Many of us also know the disappointment and failure of a marriage ending in divorce where the love has vanished only to be replaced by bitterness. There are still long-lasting, love-match marriages out there that have worked, and they will have done so because the couple worked hard at their shared life. Similarly, in an arranged marriage, effort has to be made to compromise, share and work together to keep the marriage going.

4. _____________ is a marriage entered into with the intent of deceiving public officials or society about its purpose. Arranging or entering into such a marriage is itself a separate violation of the law in some countries. While referred to as a "_____" or "______" because of its motivation, the union itself is still legally valid if it meets the formal legal requirements for marriage. After a period, a couple often divorces if the marriage is no longer useful.

5. ____________ originally meant a glamorous high society marriage between Hollywood celebrities. However, the term has grown to also have strong negative connotations of a marriage that is of short duration and quickly ends in separation or divorce. The term developed the negative connotations fairly early; by the 1930s, it was a marriage both glamorous and short-lived. This connotation may also have related, at times, to moral panics over Hollywood's influence on the culture.

6. ________ is a marriage contracted for reasons other than the reasons of relationship, family, or love. Instead, such a marriage is orchestrated for personal gain or some other sort of strategic purpose, such as political marriage. The phrase is a calque of French: mariage de convenance - a marriage of convention, or marriage of suitability. In the cases when it represents a fraud, it is called sham marriage.

7. _________ is a term used to describe a marriage in which one or both of the parties are married without his or her consent or against his or her will. A ________ marriage differs from an arranged marriage, in which both parties consent to the assistance of their parents or a third party (such as a matchmaker) in identifying a spouse, although the difference between the two may be indistinct.

8. _________ is a form of forced marriage occasioned by an unplanned pregnancy. Some religions and cultures consider it a moral imperative to marry in such a situation, based on reasoning that premarital sex or out-of-wedlock births are sinful, not sanctioned by law, or otherwise stigmatized.

Ex. 4b) Explain the meaning of to the words in bold from the article above. and give their Russian equivalents:

_ Ex. 4c) Discuss in groups: Arranged Marriages versus Love Marriages which one is better?

4 groups: Advantages of Love Marriages/ Disadvantages of Love Marriages/ Advantages Arranged Marriages/ Disadvantages Arranged Marriages

& Ex. 5a) Read the text and make its summary (10-15 sentences).