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III. Comment on the following quotations

“If you are planning on doing business with someone again, don’t be too tough in the negotiations. If you’re going to skin a cat, don’t keep it as a house cat.”

Marvin Levin

“If you come to a negotiation table saying you have the final truth, that you know nothing but the truth and that is final, you will get nothing.”

Harri Holkeri

“He who has learned to disagree without being disagreeable has discovered the most valuable secret of diplomat.”

Robert Estabrook

“Let us never negotiate out of fear. But let us never fear to negotiate.”

John F.Kennedy

“Place a higher priority on discovering what a win looks like for the other person.”

Harvey Robbins

2.3. What makes a good negotiator

Starting up

What characteristics are the most important for a good negotiator? Consider them and place in order of priority.

  • ability to plan

  • clear thinking under stress

  • general knowledge and insight

  • good communications skills

  • assertiveness

  • stamina

  • honesty

  • ability to recognize and use power,

  • high self-esteem

  • open minded and flexible

  • high aspirations.

READING

Scan the paragraph below and identify what's under the surface when you negotiate?

Many people think sales negotiations are about tactics and strategies. They are, but only on the surface. It’s what’s under the surface that determines whether negotiations work. It’s a buyer’s emotions and values that determine which tactics work and which don’t, when to select certain tactics, and what style to adopt and which to avoid.

A good metaphor for a sales negotiator is a Doctor. As a negotiator you have many tools at your disposal, much as a Physician has many possible solutions for treating a health problem: pills (thousands of different kinds) potions, ointments, shots, physical therapy, surgery, diet, lifestyle changes … there are many options. The more a Doctor knows about you – how you react and respond to different treatments, the better job they can do.

You as a negotiator are no different. You have access to different styles, techniques, tactics, strategies and options in a negotiation. Knowing which to use depends on your knowledge of the other person and their situation. What drives them under the surface? What are their values? Do they have “Hot Buttons” and other things they are “allergic” to?

Don’t make the mistake of thinking that someone doesn’t have values, or that you can’t figure out what they are. Everyone has values, and you can detect them because everyone has behaviors. Observe behaviors, and you’ll have a pretty good idea of what’s under the table with most people. I think it was William James who said, “I’ve stopped listening to what men say. I just watch what they do.”

  • What does William James mean by saying, “I’ve stopped listening to what men say. I just watch what they do”?

Exercise 1. How can you ensure that you approach people in the correct way? “Knowing About Social Styles” developed by Merrill and Reid, is a theory which is very useful to have a thorough understanding of it when negotiating. In the Social Styles Model there are four basic “styles”, or preferred ways of interacting with others. Merrill and Reid believe that a person’s social style is a way of coping with others. People become most comfortable with that style, in themselves and others.

The Four Social Styles And How You Should Negotiate With Them

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