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Файл:The Lost Girl
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THE LOST GIRL
“They gave me a drop, doctor. I felt that low.”
The doctor marched out of the room, still holding the mug
in his hand. The sick woman watched him with haunted eyes.
The attendant women threw up their hands and looked at one
another. Was he going for ever? There came a sudden smash.
The doctor had fl ung the blue mug downstairs. He returned
with a solemn stride.
“There!” he said. “And the next person that gives you stout
will be thrown down along with the mug.”
“Oh doctor, the bit o’ comfort!” wailed the sick woman.
“It ud never do me no harm.”
“Harm! Harm! With a stomach as weak as yours! Harm!
Do you know better than I do? What have I come here for?
To be told by you what will do you harm and what won’t? It
appears to me you need no doctor here, you know everything
already – ”
“Oh no, doctor. It’s not like that. But when you feel as if
you’d sink through the bed, an’ you don’t know what to do
with yourself – ”
“Take a little beef-tea, or a little rice pudding. Take nour-
ishment, don’t take that muck. Do you hear – ” charging upon
the attendant women, who shrank against the wall – ”she’s to
have nothing alcoholic at all, and don’t let me catch you giving
it her.”
“They say there’s nobbut fower per cent. i’ stout,” retorted
the daring female.
“Fower per cent,” mimicked the doctor brutally. “Why,
what does an ignorant creature like you know about fower per
cent.”
381
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
The woman muttered a little under her breath.
“What? Speak out. Let me hear what you’ve got to say, my
woman. I’ve no doubt it’s something for my benefi t – ”
But the affronted woman rushed out of the room, and
burst into tears on the landing. After which Dr. Mitchell,
mollifi ed, largely told the patient how she was to behave,
concluding:
“Nourishment! Nourishment is what you want. Nonsense,
don’t tell me you can’t take it. Push it down if it won’t go down
by itself – ”
“Oh doctor – ”
“Don’t say oh doctor to me. Do as I tell you. That’s your
business.” After which he marched out, and the rattle of his
motor car was shortly heard.
Alvina got used to scenes like these. She wondered why the
people stood it. But soon she realized that they loved it – particularly the women.
“Oh, nurse, stop till Dr. Mitchell’s been. I’m scared to death
of him, for fear he’s going to shout at me.”
“Why does everybody put up with him?” asked innocent
Alvina.
“Oh, he’s good-hearted, nurse, he does feel for you.”
And everywhere it was the same: “Oh, he’s got a heart, you
know. He’s rough, but he’s got a heart. I’d rather have him than
your smarmy slormin sort. Oh, you feel safe with Dr. Mitchell,
I don’t care what you say.”
But to Alvina this peculiar form of blustering, bullying
heart which had all the women scurrying like chickens was
not particularly attractive.
382
THE LOST GIRL
The men did not like Dr. Mitchell, and would not have
him if possible. Yet since he was club doctor and panel doctor,
they had to submit. The fi rst thing he said to a sick or injured
labourer, invariably, was:
“And keep off the beer.”
“Oh ay!”
“Keep off the beer, or I shan’t set foot in this house again.”
“Tha’s got a red enough face on thee, tha nedna shout.”
“My face is red with exposure to all weathers, attending
ignorant people like you. I never touch alcohol in any form.”
“No, an’ I dunna. I drink a drop o’ beer, if that’s what you ca’
touchin’ alcohol. An’ I’m none th’ wuss for it, tha sees.”
“You’ve heard what I’ve told you.”
“Ah, I have.”
“And if you go on with the beer, you may go on with curing
yourself. I shan’t attend you. You know I mean what I say, Mrs.
Larrick” – this to the wife.
“I do, doctor. And I know it’s true what you say. An’ I’m at
him night an’ day about it – ”
“Oh well, if he will hear no reason, he must suffer for it. He
mustn’t think I’m going to be running after him, if he disobeys
my orders.” And the doctor stalked off, and the woman began
to complain.
None the less the women had their complaints against Dr.
Mitchell. If ever Alvina entered a clean house on a wet day, she
was sure to hear the housewife chuntering.
“Oh my lawd, come in nurse! What a day! Doctor’s not been
yet. And he’s bound to come now I’ve just cleaned up, trapesin’
wi’ his gret feet. He’s got the biggest understandin’s of any man
383
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
i’ Lancaster. My husband says they’re the best pair o’ pasties th’
kingdom. An’ he does make such a mess, for he never stops to
wipe his feet on th’ mat, marches straight up your clean stairs –”
“Why don’t you tell him to wipe his feet?” said Alvina.
“Oh my word! Fancy me telling him! He’d jump down my
throat with both feet afore I’d opened my mouth. He’s not to
be spoken to, he isn’t. He’s my-lord, he is. You mustn’t look, or
you’re done for.”
Alvina laughed. She knew they all liked him for brow-beating them, and having a heart over and above.
Sometimes he was given a good hit – though nearly always
by a man. It happened he was in a workman’s house when the
man was at dinner.
“Canna yer gi’e a man summat better nor this ’ere pap, Missis?” said the hairy husband, turning up his nose at the rice
pudding.
“Oh go on,” cried the wife. “I hadna time for owt else.” Dr.
Mitchell was just stooping his handsome fi gure in the doorway.
“Rice pudding!” he exclaimed largely. “You couldn’t have
anything more wholesome and nourishing. I have a rice pudding every day of my life – every day of my life, I do.”
The man was eating his pudding and pearling his big
moustache copiously with it. He did not answer.
“Do you doctor!” cried the woman. “And never no different.”
“Never,” said the doctor.
“Fancy that! You’re that fond of them?”
“I fi nd they agree with me. They are light and digestible.
And my stomach is as weak as a baby’s.”
The labourer wiped his big moustache on his sleeve.
384
THE LOST GIRL
“Mine isna, tha sees,” he said, “so pap’s no use. ‘S watter ter
me. I want ter feel as I’ve had summat: a bit o’ suetty dumplin’
an’ a pint o’ hale, summat ter fi ll th’ hole up. An’ tha’d be th’
same if tha did my work.”
“If I did your work,” sneered the doctor. “Why I do ten
times the work that any one of you does. It’s just the work
that has ruined my digestion, the never getting a quiet meal,
and never a whole night’s rest. When do you think I can sit
at table and digest my dinner? I have to be off looking after
people like you – ”
“Eh, tha can ta’e th’ titty-bottle wi’ thee,” said the labourer.
But Dr. Mitchell was furious for weeks over this. It put him
in a black rage to have his great manliness insulted. Alvina was
quietly amused.
The doctor began by being rather lordly and condescending with her. But luckily she felt she knew her work at least as
well as he knew it. She smiled and let him condescend. Certainly she neither feared nor even admired him. To tell the
truth, she rather disliked him: the great, red-faced bachelor
of fi fty-three, with his bald spot and his stomach as weak as
a baby’s, and his mouthing imperiousness and his good heart
which was as selfi sh as it could be. Nothing can be more cocksuredly selfi sh than a good heart which believes in its own
benefi cence. He was a little too much the teetotaller on the
one hand to be so largely manly on the other. Alvina preferred
the labourers with their awful long moustaches that got full
of food. And he was a little too loud-mouthedly lordly to be in
human good taste.
385
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
As a matter of fact, he was conscious of the fact that he had
risen to be a gentleman. Now if a man is conscious of being
a gentleman, he is bound to be a little less than a man. But if he
is gnawed with anxiety lest he may not be a gentleman, he is
only pitiable. There is a third case, however. If a man must loftily, by his manner, assert that he is now a gentleman, he shows
himself a clown. For Alvina, poor Dr. Mitchell fell into this
third category, of clowns. She tolerated him good-humouredly,
as women so often tolerate ninnies and poseurs. She smiled
to herself when she saw his large and important presence on
the board. She smiled when she saw him at a sale, buying the
grandest pieces of antique furniture. She smiled when he talked of going up to Scotland, for grouse shooting, or of snatching an hour on Sunday morning, for golf. And she talked him
over, with quiet, delicate malice, with the matron. He was no
favourite at the hospital.
Gradually Dr. Mitchell’s manner changed towards her.
From his imperious condescension he took to a tone of uneasy
equality. This did not suit him. Dr. Mitchell had no equals: he
had only the vast stratum of inferiors, towards whom he exercised his quite profi table benefi cence – it brought him in
about two thousand a year: and then his superiors, people who
had been born with money. It was the tradesmen and professionals who had started at the bottom and clambered to the
motor-car footing, who distressed him. And therefore, whilst
he treated Alvina on this uneasy tradesman footing, he felt
himself in a false position.
She kept her attitude of quiet amusement, and little by little he sank. From being a lofty creature soaring over her head,
386
THE LOST GIRL
he was now like a big fi sh poking its nose above water and
making eyes at her. He treated her with rather presuming deference.
“You look tired this morning,” he barked at her one hot
day. “I think it’s thunder,” she said.
“Thunder! Work, you mean,” and he gave a slight smile.
“I’m going to drive you back.”
“Oh no, thanks, don’t trouble! I’ve got to call on the way.”
“Where have you got to call?”
She told him.
“Very well. That takes you no more than fi ve minutes. I’ll
wait for you. Now take your cloak.”
She was surprised. Yet, like other women, she submitted.
As they drove he saw a man with a barrow of cucumbers.
He stopped the car and leaned towards the man.
“Take that barrow-load of poison and bury it!” he shouted,
in his strong voice. The busy street hesitated.
“What’s that, mister?” replied the mystifi ed hawker.
Dr. Mitchell pointed to the green pile of cucumbers.
“Take that barrow-load of poison, and bury it,” he called,
“before you do anybody any more harm with it.”
“What barrow-load of poison’s that?” asked the hawker,
approaching. A crowd began to gather.
“What barrow-load of poison is that!” repeated the doctor.
“Why your barrow-load of cucumbers.”
“Oh,” said the man, scrutinizing his cucumbers carefully.
To be sure, some were a little yellow at the end. “How’s that?
Cumbers is right enough: fresh from market this morning.”
387
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
“Fresh or not fresh,” said the doctor, mouthing his words
distinctly, “you might as well put poison into your stomach, as
those things. Cucumbers are the worst thing you can eat.”
“Oh!” said the man, stuttering. “That’s ‘appen for them as
doesn’t like them. I niver knowed a cumber do me no harm, an’
I eat ’em like a happle.” Whereupon the hawker took a “cumber” from his barrow, bit off the end, and chewed it till the sap
squirted. “What’s wrong with that?” he said, holding up the
bitten cucumber.
“I’m not talking about what’s wrong with that,” said the
doctor. “My business is what’s wrong with the stomach it goes
into. I’m a doctor. And I know that those things cause me half
my work. They cause half the internal troubles people suffer
from in summertime.”
“Oh ay! That’s no loss to you, is it? Me an’ you’s partners.
More cumbers I sell, more graft for you, ‘cordin’ to that. What’s
wrong then. Cum-bers! Fine fresh Cum-berrrs! All fresh and
juisty, all cheap and tasty – !” yelled the man.
“I am a doctor not only to cure illness, but to prevent it
where I can. And cucumbers are poison to everybody.”
“Cum-bers! Cum-bers! Fresh cumbers!” yelled the man.
Dr. Mitchell started his car.
“When will they learn intelligence?” he said to Alvina,
smiling and showing his white, even teeth.
“I don’t care, you know, myself,” she said. “I should always
let people do what they wanted – ”
“Even if you knew it would do them harm?” he queried,
smiling with amiable condescension.
388
THE LOST GIRL
“Yes, why not! It’s their own affair. And they’ll do themselves harm one way or another.”
“And you wouldn’t try to prevent it?”
“You might as well try to stop the sea with your fi ngers.”
“You think so?” smiled the doctor. “I see, you are a pessimist. You are a pessimist with regard to human nature.”
“Am I?” smiled Alvina, thinking the rose would smell as
sweet. It seemed to please the doctor to fi nd that Alvina was
a pessimist with regard to human nature. It seemed to give her
an air of distinction. In his eyes, she seemed distinguished. He
was in a fair way to dote on her.
She, of course, when he began to admire her, liked him
much better, and even saw graceful, boyish attractions in
him. There was really something childish about him. And this
something childish, since it looked up to her as if she were the
saving grace, naturally fl attered her and made her feel gentler
towards him.
He got in the habit of picking her up in his car, when he
could. And he would tap at the matron’s door, smiling and
showing all his beautiful teeth, just about tea-time.
“May I come in?” His voice sounded almost fl irty.
“Certainly.”
“I see you’re having tea! Very nice, a cup of tea at this hour!”
“Have one too, doctor.”
“I will with pleasure.” And he sat down wreathed with
smiles. Alvina rose to get a cup. “I didn’t intend to disturb you,
nurse,” he said. “Men are always intruders,” he smiled to the
matron.
389
DAVID HERBERT LAWRENCE
“Sometimes,” said the matron, “women are charmed to be
intruded upon.”
“Oh really!” his eyes sparkled. “Perhaps you wouldn’t say
so, nurse?” he said, turning to Alvina. Alvina was just reaching
at the cupboard. Very charming she looked, in her fresh dress
and cap and soft brown hair, very attractive her fi gure, with its
full, soft loins. She turned round to him.
“Oh yes,” she said. “I quite agree with the matron.”
“Oh, you do!” He did not quite know how to take it. “But
you mind being disturbed at your tea, I am sure.”
“No,” said Alvina. “We are so used to being disturbed.”
“Rather weak, doctor?” said the matron, pouring the tea.
“Very weak, please.”
The doctor was a little laboured in his gallantry, but unmistakably gallant. When he was gone, the matron looked demure, and Alvina confused. Each waited for the other to speak.
“Don’t you think Dr. Mitchell is quite coming out?” said
Alvina.
“Quite! Quite the ladies’ man! I wonder who it is can be
bringing him out. A very praiseworthy work, I am sure.” She
looked wickedly at Alvina.
“No, don’t look at me,” laughed Alvina, “I know nothing
about it.”
“Do you think it may be me!” said the matron, mischievous.
“I’m sure of it, matron! He begins to show some taste at last.”
“There now!” said the matron. “I shall put my cap straight.”
And she went to the mirror, fl uffi ng her hair and settling her cap.
“There!” she said, bobbing a little curtsey to Alvina.
They both laughed, and went off to work.
390
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