The Nuisance of Overheard Calls

By Joyce Wadler New York Times

The setting was bucolic when the high-powered cell-phone couple went away for the weekend to a little inn in Maine. The inn, said Lisa Linden and Lloyd Kaplan, public relations partners in New York, had great charm, with a barn and a view and Nubian goats munching on the lawn. And, as some other guests were carrying on a rather loud conversation, Ms. Linden felt there would be some understanding when her cell phone rang during dinner. She stayed on for 45 minutes.

Best to skim over the humiliating reprimand from the management that followed and focus on Ms. Linden's defence. "I spoke very quietly and I thought it would be a brief call, but it was a client in crisis," she said.

"You can't hang up on a client in crisis, even if the only other sound you hear is the goats munching. I certainly apologize to the innkeepers for unintentionally violating the calm, but these days, is speaking quietly on a cell phone in a dining room that is noisy a total breach of etiquette?" There are several million cellular phone users in the New York City region, according to Bell Atlantic Mobile. Statistics on how many are yelling into their phones are unavailable.

What is known is that the cell-phone people are everywhere: carrying on long, noisy, intrusive conversations on Metro-North; conducting phone meetings in restaurants; dialling up friends when they're sitting behind first base at a Yankee game to report they're on television. Those in denial often excuse themselves with the big lie. I got it for the car. The hard-core users, who often feel no need to apologize, insist they need the phones for work. So that now in New York, where space is shared and where cellular conversations take place in the street and the bus and the commuter train and thus often become everyone's conversation, a battle of manners is being waged.

The Cellular Telecommunications Industry Association, which is based in Washington, asked the advice columnist Judith Martin, who writes under the name Miss Manners, to do an etiquette booklet on cell phones five years ago. According to the association's spokesman, Tim Ayers, copies are still available. "I'll be real honest with you," Mr. Ayers said. "There wasn't much demand."

Next week, Omnipoint Communications, a wireless-telephone company based in New Jersey, will be publishing "Wireless Etiquette: A Guide to the Changing World of Instant Communication" by Peter Laufer.

"I don't have a reputation for decorum," Mr. Laufer said this week from his home in Sonoma County, north of San Francisco. "But it's clear to me people need a little guidance. Like one winter, I'm on the observation deck of the Empire State Building. It was grey and cold and really special, the snow made it quiet, and some guy was yelling into his cell phone. He seemed to be missing the moment." Does Mr. Laufer believe it is rude to use cell phones on the train?

"There are ways to use them and ways not to use them," Mr. Laufer said. "We need to train ourselves that the devices are sensitive enough that there is no need to yell into them. We're like our grandmothers using the long distance line; their voices go up unnecessarily high and loud."

A sports executive who commutes from Westchester and makes phone calls on the train says he is not the problem. "I've never had anyone other than my wife tell me I'm talking too loud," the executive said. "The people who are shunned are the ones making those loud personal calls."

Then again, what constitutes proper behaviour may be determined by where you live.

Alexandra Atkins, an assistant at Dan Klores public relations, attended her sister's wedding in Italy last June in a villa near Florence. Cell phones rang continually. In the middle of the dinner, when the best man was making a toast to the groom, the groom's phone rang.

"He answered it," said Ms. Atkins. "I'm not kidding, I have a picture. It was his Uncle Fredo from wherever, wishing him good luck on his wedding. I don't think my sister cared. She was like: "Whatever. I'm married. My family couldn't get over it."

But there is a reason for cell-phone use in Italy, Ms. Atkins discovered. Land lines are taxed at 30 percent; cell phones are taxed at 10 percent, and people use cell phones in their homes.

Sybil Adelman, a New York comedy writer, lived for several years in Los Angeles, where cell phones first became common. "I was having dinner in L.A. once, there were eight people in a Mexican restaurant and each one of them had a cell phone," Ms. Adelman said. "I looked at them and thought, 'So why did we all have to come here?'" Now Ms. Adelman is a convert. Her manners have not always been perfect. There was the time during her visit to her son's Quaker school that her phone rang during the silent meeting. Still, Ms. Adelman remains a fan. "The best use I had for the phone was when I was at the Javits centre with my sister-in-law and I lost her," Ms. Adelman said. "I picked up the phone and called her." She had another success story: "My brother told me he was in a theatre where a man dropped his cell phone before the curtain went up and was frantic. Another guy said, 'Give me your number; when it rings, we'll find it.'"

A woman visiting Ms. Adelman jumps in with her own anecdote: "I had a friend who was hiking in a park in England. He was lost and it was getting dark, and he didn't know what to do. So he called his secretary in New York and she called some park officials, and they called him and told him how to find his way out."

But not all cell-phone stories have happy endings. An account executive in her 20's has a cautionary tale.

"A girlfriend of mine was out Saturday night with a guy she was dating," she said. "They were with a group of people going to a bar, and my friend got into one cab and the guy got into another. She called him in his cab from her cab and got his voice mail, so she thinks he's ditched her. She tells all her girlfriends in the cab what a jerk he is. She didn't realize she had left her phone on. He called her back and played all seven minutes of it."

It sounds as if there is a lesson in etiquette here. The account executive agrees.

"Everybody should make sure the phone is turned off before they start tearing into somebody."

b) Scanning

Read each of the questions and look for the answers in the article. Mark the question number in the margin to show where the answer is located. Highlight the key words and write the answer in note form.

1. a. Why did inn management reprimand Lisa Linden?

b. What was her reaction?

2. a. How many cell-phone users are there in the New York City area?

b. Where are cell phones used?

3. According to Peter Laufer, what can people do to use cell phones more politely?

4. What is the reason why cell-phone use is common in Italy?

5. What is one example of how cell phones can be a real help?

6. What is one example of how cell phones can get you into trouble?

c) Note-Taking: Chunking Information

Step 1: Skim the article and find information for the following Main Ideas about cell-phone use in New York.

A. Places where cell phones are used in New York.

B. A guide to good cell-phone manners.

C. Cell-phone use in Italy and Los Angeles.

D. Stories of success and caution with cell-phone use.

Underline or highlight this information.

Step 2: Use brackets [ ] to show sections that detail the same idea.

Step 3: Write the letter (A, B, C, or D) that identifies each of these chunks in the margin of the reading.

Step 4: Use the following outline to note important details.

d) Reacting to the Reading

These two readings combine personal stories with factual information about cell-phone use. Based on the information, and your own opinion, answer these questions.

1. What are the most important reasons for having a cell phone? What reasons are least important?

2. How are cell phones changing our ways of communicating?

3. How are cell phones changing our ways of behaving in public?

4. Are cell phones a nuisance or a convenience? Explain your reasoning.

5. Will cell phones replace land-based phones in the future? Why or why not?

e) Vocabulary In Context

1) Circle the phrase that is closest in meaning to the words in boldface in these sentences. Then, in the reading, find and underline those words. Circle any words or phrases that help make the meaning clear.

1. After talking for a few minutes, they reached a consensus on where to go for dinner.

a. an argument b. an agreement c. an advancement

2. They are moving to install metal detectors in the school.

a. remove b. permit c. put in

3. The Phone Company is phasing out phone booths.

a. removing over time b. putting in over time c. repairing over time

4. On the other hand, hardly anyone needs phone booths anymore.

a. in addition b. in time c. in contrast

5. She received a reprimand from the management.

a. reminder b. recommendation c. warning

6. I don't have a reputation for decorum, but people need a little guidance.

a. good manners b. bad manners c. behaviour

7. She was acting in a very intrusive manner.

a. welcoming b. inquisitive c. unwelcoming

8. Cell-phone use in Finland has very quickly reached its saturation point.

a. complete use b. partial use c. overuse

2) Complete each sentence with one of the following adverbs that fits it best.

a. linguistically b. literally c. rapidly

d. routinely e. virtually

1. They were _______ running while carrying on a running conversation.

2. Finland is _______ becoming a country where everyone has a cell phone.

3. I _______ call five or six people I'm close to every day.

4. _______ speaking, this was the most interesting article I've read so far.

5. They were _______ the only people not to purchase a cell phone.

Check your answers. Work with a partner and take turns reading your sentences. Together, find three other sentences that contain adverbs and discuss the meanings of each.

f) Jigsaw Sentences

Match each of the clauses in Column A with those in Column B that would best complete them.

ColumnA 1. As some of the guests were carrying on a loud conversation,......... 2. I have a couple of old phones sitting around,..... 3. When people call for directory assistance,......... 4. Since everyone is expected to have a phone all the time,.........

Column B the boss can always find you. so I'll probably give him one. the operator sends the number in the form of a text message. she thought they wouldn't be disturbed by the cell phone.